SEND Parenting Podcast

• EP 143: Stop Mothering Me! Understanding Your Teen’s Push for Independence

  Half-term chaos, slammed doors, sharp words—if that sounds familiar, you are not alone. In this episode, Dr Olivia Kessel sits down with teen expert Kim McCabe to unpack why your once-snuggly child suddenly bristles at “How was your day?” and how to respond without losing your cool or your connection. From the teenage brain’s rebuild to the unique load neurodiverse teens carry, we explore what is really happening under the surface—and the simple shifts that can change everything at home.Kim explains why after-school meltdowns often land on parents, how masking drains emotional capacity, and what co-regulation looks like in real life. Together, we cover how to use short validating phrases instead of lectures, hold boundaries that reflect your core values, and create safe outlets for big feelings that do not harm anyone. You will hear why permissiveness can feel like indifference to teens, how to choose a few non-negotiables, and when to step back so your young person can save face and recover their balance.We also share low-pressure ways to rebuild closeness: monthly parent–teen “dates,” visiting their world first—whether that is gaming, football, memes, or TikTok—without judgment, and narrating your own self-regulation to model coping. Whether you are parenting girls or boys, mums or dads, neurotypical or neurodiverse, the principles hold true: be the parent, team up with other adults, and protect your own capacity. Calm and loving is your superpower—but it needs fuel.If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a parent who needs a boost, and leave a quick review so more families can find these tools. And if you are ready for deeper support, check the show notes for details on the Recharge and Connect SEND Summit—join us in person or via live stream.💬 Resources Mentioned in This EpisodeIf today’s conversation with Kim McCabe resonated with you, you can find out more about her work at Rites for Girls, where she supports parents and teens through the transitions of adolescence. Explore her brilliant book, From Daughter to Woman: Parenting Girls Safely Through Their Teens, and discover her Weekend Retreat for Mothers of Daughters — a beautiful space to reconnect, reflect, and parent with greater awareness and ease. And if you are ready to recharge yourself, not just your parenting, join me in person at the Recharge & Connect SEND Parenting Summit on Tuesday, November 11th, 10:00–2:30 PM in Henley-on-Thames — or via livestream from the comfort of your home. It is a day designed to restore your energy, expand your support network, and empower your next steps. You can also join our growing community of Warrior Mums inside the ADHD Warrior Mum’s Recharge Station — your space for support, connection, and calm.

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• EP 142 Saying yes until she failed changed everything

  Burnout has a way of making even the smallest task feel impossible. We open with a lifeline for parents raising neurodivergent children, then sit down with campaigner and founder Agnes Agyepong to trace how postnatal depression and isolation became the spark for two powerful vehicles of change: the Glow Mama Awards and a research-led movement tackling maternal and SEND inequalities.Agnes shares the surprising role social media played in her recovery—authentic posts, wry humour, and micro-moments of solidarity that made her feel seen. That insight grows into Glow Mama, a people’s choice awards platform celebrating the creators who keep mothers going at 3 a.m. From there, Agnes dives into the Black maternal health crisis and the environmental factors that stack the odds against families long before labour begins, culminating in the Black Child Clean Air Report and cross-sector partnerships. The throughline is clear: these are public health problems that show up in clinics, classrooms, and on our streets.We dig into SEND inequity with lived experience. Agnes talks about being treated with suspicion when her son was self-harming, becoming a school governor to be heard, and the way adultification bias and rigid behaviour policies fast-track exclusions before support arrives. We challenge the outdated, industrial model of schooling and argue for personalised education that works for every brain. Practical guidance runs throughout: why a Year 3 screening won’t secure legal protections, how an Educational Psychologist’s report unlocks exam access and durable support, and how to build an evidence trail that proves whether a school can meet need.If you want clear next steps, we’ve got them: back petitions so policymakers see the data, write your MP so SEND rises in local triage, connect with specialist groups for Education Other Than At School pathways, and join community networks that share tactics without gatekeeping. Neurodivergent thinkers are not problems to be fixed; they are the innovators we need. Subscribe, share with a caregiver who needs hope, and leave a review to help more families find real tools and real change. And if you are ready to recharge yourself, not just your parenting, join me in person at the Recharge & Connect SEND Parenting Summit on Tuesday, November 11th, 10:00–2:30 PM in Henley-on-Thames — or via livestream from the comfort of your home. It is a day designed to restore your energy, expand your support network, and empower your next steps. You can also join our growing community of Warrior Mums inside the ADHD Warrior Mum’s Recharge Station — your space for support, connection, and calm.

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• EP 141 Unschooling Yourself: Letting Go of the ‘Shoulds’ in Parenting

   What if the problem was never your child—but the system itself? In this powerful conversation, Dr. Olivia sits down with Esther Jones, mindfulness teacher, mother of three, and author of The Parent’s Handbook to Unschooling Yourself, to explore what happens when we let go of the ‘shoulds’ that weigh parents down. From daily battles over school refusal to the pressure of academic milestones, Esther shares her family’s journey into unschooling—a path that focuses on curiosity, connection, and trust rather than control.Together, they unpack how mindfulness and self-compassion can transform not just how our children learn, but how we parent. Whether you are curious about alternatives to traditional education or simply looking for a way to bring more calm and joy into your home, this episode will help you see that the first step to helping your child thrive might just be learning to “unschool” yourself.Author & mindful parenting coachBook: The Parent's Handbook to Unschooling YourselfPodcast: The Unschool SpaceWebsite: www.esther-jones.com👉 Join ADHD Warrior Mum: The Recharge Station Join Dr. Olivia Kessel and leading SEND experts at the Recharge and Connect Summit on 11 November 2025 at Phyllis Court, Henley-on-Thames (also livestreamed). A day to recharge, connect, and gain practical tools for raising neurodiverse children. 💛 👉 sendparenting.com/event And if you are ready to recharge yourself, not just your parenting, join me in person at the Recharge & Connect SEND Parenting Summit on Tuesday, November 11th, 10:00–2:30 PM in Henley-on-Thames — or via livestream from the comfort of your home. It is a day designed to restore your energy, expand your support network, and empower your next steps. You can also join our growing community of Warrior Mums inside the ADHD Warrior Mum’s Recharge Station — your space for support, connection, and calm.

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• EP 140: Meltdowns, Decoded

  ✨ Click here for SENsory Mother - Laura Ellis✨ Click here for 30-day Guide to Better Sleep 👉 Join ADHD Warrior Mum: The Recharge StationWhat if the meltdown in your hallway isn’t defiance at all, but a terrified nervous system asking for help? We go straight to the heart of “challenging behaviour” with Laura, a teacher and mum of neurodivergent twins, who moved from daily crisis to a calmer, kinder home by changing how she understood panic, overload, and connection. Her story spans premature birth, early diagnoses, masking at school, and the moment everything fell apart—then slowly came back together.We break down the physiology of fight or flight in plain English—what rising heart rate, redirected blood flow, and sensory overwhelm do to a child’s thinking brain—and why sticker charts and lectures backfire mid-meltdown. You’ll hear the hidden social demands most of us miss: the chirpy morning greeting, the barrage of car-ride questions, the insistence on eye contact. We swap over-talking for visuals and scripts, and share a deceptively simple morning playlist that turned dread into momentum. Curiosity replaces blame through a great example of literal thinking (yes, he handed over the red and blue food colouring—because that’s what was asked).We also map the sensory layer—why kicking and slamming can signal a need for proprioception—and how a realistic sensory routine lowers baseline stress. A striking moment at a cricket match shows how the right environment can flip chaos to clarity in seconds. Boundaries still matter, but timing is everything: teach after calm, not during crisis, and make consequences predictable, visual, and discussed in advance. If you’ve felt hopeless, ashamed, or judged, this conversation will hand you language, tools, and the relief of being understood.Want more support and live coaching with neurodiversity experts? Join the ADHD Warrior Mom Recharge Station for weekly group coaching, monthly masterclasses, self-care sessions, and a community that gets it. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs hope today, and leave a review to help more families find us. And if you are ready to recharge yourself, not just your parenting, join me in person at the Recharge & Connect SEND Parenting Summit on Tuesday, November 11th, 10:00–2:30 PM in Henley-on-Thames — or via livestream from the comfort of your home. It is a day designed to restore your energy, expand your support network, and empower your next steps. You can also join our growing community of Warrior Mums inside the ADHD Warrior Mum’s Recharge Station — your space for support, connection, and calm.

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• EP 139: Why Punishments From 1846 Still Don't Work Today

  Dr Olivia Kessel welcomes back co-authors Georgina Benger and Karen Price to discuss restorative justice as a compassionate, relationship-based approach that helps children understand the impact of their actions and repair harm.• Georgina's research at Cambridge University revealed schools still use the same punishment methods from 1846 despite their ineffectiveness• Traditional punishments fail to teach accountability and create patterns where children accept consequences without understanding impact• Restorative justice shifts focus from punishment to repairing relationships through a seven-step process• Creating a safe space, active listening, and acknowledging emotions are foundational steps in restorative practice• The approach encourages children to explore the impact of their actions and take accountability without forced apologies• Particularly beneficial for neurodivergent children who often experience disproportionate punishment in traditional systems• Implementing restorative practices in schools requires time initially but becomes embedded in culture and ultimately saves time• Children learn to resolve conflicts independently when these practices are consistently modeled• The core principles include prioritizing relationships, focusing on learning rather than labeling, and recognizing that healing should involve everyoneIf getting your child to sleep feels like a battle, download our free 30-day Better Sleep Starter Guide at sendparenting.com/sleep – designed with ADHD in mind but effective for all neurodiverse children.📘  Click here for Willow's Day ✨ Click here for 30-day Guide to Better Sleep 👉 Join ADHD Warrior Mum: The Recharge Station And if you are ready to recharge yourself, not just your parenting, join me in person at the Recharge & Connect SEND Parenting Summit on Tuesday, November 11th, 10:00–2:30 PM in Henley-on-Thames — or via livestream from the comfort of your home. It is a day designed to restore your energy, expand your support network, and empower your next steps. You can also join our growing community of Warrior Mums inside the ADHD Warrior Mum’s Recharge Station — your space for support, connection, and calm.

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