Raised Resilient: Help Your Highly Sensitive Child

If you’ve ever googled “are time outs effective,” puzzled over time out vs time in, or typed “do time outs work” because something just doesn’t feel right, this one is for you.

In this episode, I break down the difference between a punishment timeout and a break your child needs.

You’ll learn:

What the one-minute rule for time outs for 3 year olds assumes about your child

What time outs for 2 year olds ask of a toddler brain mid-meltdown

Why are time outs not developmentally appropriate for a child who already knows the rule

What the shame vs guilt definition reveals about the story your child tells on the stairs

What the time in vs time out debate keeps leaving out

What a bored preschooler and a baby sibling at dinner reveal about breaks

What two keys decide whether a break feels like support or punishment

How breaks build emotional regulation skills in kids and the grown-ups they watch

What happens when you remove your child at the very first sign of hitting

Why emotional regulation in preschoolers can sound like “go away,” then “come back”

If you’ve binged every gentle parenting how-to-discipline video and still feel a pit in your stomach… this one’s for you.

Here’s to raising resilient kids,
Dr. Hilary

Find more from Dr. Hilary:

Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group

Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

Have you ever read every book and saved every script, only to freeze the second your child starts kicking and throwing things?

 

In this episode, I share my conversation with Jen, a scientist and mom of a seven-and-a-half-year-old daughter and a five-and-a-half-year-old son, who completed Chaos to Connection, my eight-week parenting program. Jen found me in a hard season, right after the holidays, when meltdowns were daily and her son would hide under the table any time she tried to correct him.

 

She opens up about why she almost didn't join, what surprised her along the way, and how things feel at home now. I'm SO proud of her!

 

You'll learn:

Why knowing ALL the scripts can still leave you stuck with your sensitive kid

What your "fine" kid might be carrying because of your sibling dynamics

Why your easy kid might get harder as your family dynamics shift

What made parent coaching click for a mom who'd already tried everything

What breaking the cycle of childhood meltdowns really looks like in your home

How sibling jealousy can hide behind behavior that looks careless

What Jen changed about her own role when sibling rivalry flared up

What the way you were raised taught you about siblings fighting

Why sibling conflict looks different once you see what it's teaching your kids

How to deal with sibling rivalry when you worry your kids won't be close as adults

 

If you already know what to do and keep getting stuck on actually doing it, this conversation is for you. Here's the thing: we're humans raising humans, so hard days WILL come... and the goal is knowing how to handle them so they don't become patterns that keep getting worse. You can learn that, even if you already know a lot. It's never too late!

 

Here's to raising resilient kids,

 

Dr. Hilary

 

Find more from Dr. Hilary:

Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group

Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

Does your child go from angry at breakfast to yelling "I hate you" by dinner?

In today's episode, I unpack why your child seems angry all the time and what's REALLY going on underneath. We get into where does people pleasing come from, which is an important starting point since so many of us grew up conflict avoidant, sitting on suppressed anger.

You'll learn:

What causes people pleasing, and how it shapes the way you react to anger

How a "good girl" childhood can lead to a conflict avoidant personality as an adult

Why a five-year-old's anger comes out in such messy ways (and yours did, too)

How your own repressed anger can show up when your child starts yelling

Why anger is a secondary emotion, and what it might be protecting your sensitive kid from

Why mom rage can flare the second your child gets angry at you

What is emotional safety, and what does it look like on a hard day?

What softening really means when your child is kicking and calling you names

How to create emotional safety when you're too angry to soften

Why it can feel like gentle parenting doesn't work, even with the right script

If your child seems angry ALL the time and you've started to wonder if this is just who they are, this episode is for you.

Here's to raising resilient kids,

Dr. Hilary

Find more from Dr. Hilary:

Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group

Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

Have you ever caught yourself Googling "am I raising a narcissist" at 2am after another rough day? Does your child hit their sister, call you names, and show zero remorse? Do they melt down every time you say no, or shut down the second you ask them to own what happened?

In this episode, I share why sensitive, emotionally intense kids can look narcissistic.

You'll learn:

Why your sensitive kid can show a lack of empathy when someone else is hurting

Why your child's still-developing emotional regulation can get mistaken for narcissism

What narcissistic personality disorder actually looks like, according to the DSM-5

What your child's age has to do with the question of raising a narcissist

How narcissism really develops, and what's hiding underneath all that grandiosity

Why your sensitive kid feels SO much shame, no matter what you do

What is emotional safety, and how it changes the way your child handles shame

What does emotional safety look like when your child has just hit their sibling

How to create emotional safety after you've lost your cool with your kid

What's really behind extreme defensiveness when you ask your child to take accountability

If you’ve ever worried about what your child’s behavior means for who they will become, this episode will help you understand what may be going on underneath the surface.

Here's to raising resilient kids,

Dr. Hilary

Find more from Dr. Hilary:

Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group

Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website

Is gentle parenting not working even after every script you've tried?

Gentle parenting was never meant to be a list of scripts you follow perfectly. Your child is unique, and what helps one child calm down can make another child feel even more overwhelmed.

So, in today's episode, I share five popular gentle parenting techniques that can make meltdowns worse with your sensitive kid, and WHY each one backfires.

You'll learn:

Why gentle parenting doesn't work the way the reels make it look with your sensitive kid

What your child actually hears when you circle back after the meltdown

Why your child can tell you hitting isn't kind and still do it again

How the emotional water pitcher explains the meltdown that shows up after school

How co-regulation strategies for parents shift when your child yells "go away"

What co regulation parenting looks like when naming feelings makes it worse

What gentle parenting REALLY asks of you when your kid needs your calm

How to catch yourself as an overstimulated mom before your tone turns sharp

If you’re tired of wondering why the strategies you’ve been told to use aren’t helping, this episode will help you understand what may be happening underneath the meltdown and what your child might actually need from you in those moments.

Here's to raising resilient kids,

Dr. Hilary

Find more from Dr. Hilary:

Raised Resilient | Website | Instagram | Facebook Group

Raised Resilient Chaos to Connection Program | Website