Dave and Bethlie continue their multi-part series on the book Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp. Part 4 5. The rod defined - p. 104 “The rod is a parent, in faith toward God and faithfullness toward his or her children, undertaking the responsibility of careful, timely, measured, and controlled use of physical punishment to underscore the importance of obeying God, thus rescuing the child from continuing in his foolishness unto death.” It is a parental exercise 2. It is an act of faith in God and His Word It is an act of faithfulness - an expression of love and comitment It is an act of responsibility - not a parent determining to punish, but a parent determining to obey It is an act of physical punishment Not venting or parental anger Not frustration Not based on a feeling of my child is bothering me It is always measured and controlled It is a rescue mission Rescues the child from continuing in foolishness To ignore your child’s rebellion against God’s authority is to ultimately brings God’s greater chastisement into their lives. 6. The Rod clarified Not unbridled temper Not the right to hit my child Not venting or frustration Not retribution Not payment but restoration Not vindictive 7. The Rod objected I love my child too much too spank You love yourself too much to spank them I am afraid I will hurt them “Biblically-balanced discipline never physically endangers a child” I am afraid it will make him rebellious and angry Proverbs 29:17 teaches the exact opposite I am afraid it will teach them to hit Only if you spank in anger It doesn’t work It doesn’t when you spank in anger or out-of-control It doesn’t when you are inconsistent It doesn’t when you fail to be persistent It doesn’t when you aren’t effective I could be arrested for child abuse Only spank in the privacy of your home and do it right
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Books That Can Help...and Why [Tripp] Part 3
Dave and Bethlie continue their multi-part series on the book Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp. PART 3 4. His comments about the ROD are really good in chapter 11 Children are not born morally and ethically neutral If they are they don’t need correction, just direction If they are not, then they need correction Our child’s problem is that he or she is a sinner! p. 102. Folly is the problem we have to address according to proverbs Folly is not childishness Folly describes the person who does not fear God A fools life is run by his desires and fears The fool lives out of the immediacy of his lusts, cravings, expectations, hopes, and fears The issue is authority Will a child live under the authority of God and his parents? Will he/she live under their own authority? All children choose to live under their own authority: I don’t want my diaper changed I don’t want to sit quietly at the table during this meal You are going to make me and if you do I will scream and throw a huge fit Leave this to take root and grow, and it produces “a rebellious teenager who will not allow anyone to rule him.” “God has ordained the rod of discipline for this condition.” p. 103 “Confrontation, with the immediate and undeniably tactile sensation of a spanking, renders an implacable child sweet.” (p. 103) The quote on p 103 is massively important 4. The rod’s function It imparts wisdom Pr 29:15, which is tied to the fear of god “It creates an atmosphere in which instruction can be given. The spanking renders the child compliant and ready to receive life-giving words.” (p 104) Tripp deals with the question - don’t all children eventually learn to obey? He say NO!! Proverbs 29:15, 17
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Books That Can Help...and Why [Tripp] Part 2
PART 2 3. Some important quotes stand out! 4. His comments about the ROD are really good in chapter 11 Children are not born morally and ethically neutral If they are they don’t need correction, just direction If they are not, then they need correction Our child’s problem is that he or she is a sinner! p. 102. Folly is the problem we have to address according to proverbs Folly is not childishness Folly describes the person who does not fear God A fools life is run by his desires and fears The fool lives out of the immediacy of his lusts, cravings, expectations, hopes, and fears The issue is authority Will a child live under the authority of God and his parents? Will he/she live under their own authority? All children choose to live under their own authority: I don’t want my diaper changed I don’t want to sit quietly at the table during this meal You are going to make me and if you do I will scream and throw a huge fit Leave this to take root and grow, and it produces “a rebellious teenager who will not allow anyone to rule him.” “God has ordained the rod of discipline for this condition.” p. 103 “Confrontation, with the immediate and undeniably tactile sensation of a spanking, renders an implacable child sweet.” (p. 103) The quote on p 103 is massively important The function of the rod It imparts wisdom Pr 29:15, which is tied to the fear of god “It creates an atmosphere in which instruction can be given. The spanking renders the child compliant and ready to receive life-giving words.” (p 104) Tripp deals with the question - don’t all children eventually learn to obey? He say NO!! Proverbs 29:15, 17 The rod defined - p. 104 “The rod is a parent, in faith toward God and faithfullness toward his or her children, undertaking the responsibility of careful, timely, measured, and controlled use of physical punishment to underscore the importance of obeying God, thus rescuing the child from continuing in his foolishness unto death.” It is a parental exercise It is an act of faith in God and His Word It is an act of faithfulness - an expression of love and comitment It is an act of responsibility - not a parent determining to punish, but a parent determining to obey It is an act of physical punishment Not venting or parental anger Not frustration Not based on a feeling of my child is bothering me It is always measured and controlled It is a rescue mission Rescues the child from continuing in foolishness To ignore your child’s rebellion against God’s authority is to ultimately brings God’s greater chastisement into their lives. The Rod clarified Not unbridled temper Not the right to hit my child Not venting or frustration not retribution Not payment but restoration Not vindictive The Rod objected I love my child too much too spank You love yourself too much to spank them I am afraid I will hurt them “Biblically-balanced discipline never physically endangers a child” I am afraid it will make him rebellious and angry Proverbs 29:17 teaches the exact opposite I am afraid it will teach them to hit Only if you spank in anger It doesn’t work It doesn’t when you spank in anger or out-of-control It doesn’t when you are inconsistent It doesn’t when you fail to be persistent It doesn’t when you aren’t effective I could be arrested for child abuse Only spank in the privacy of your home and do it right
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Books That Can Help...and Why [Tripp] Part 1
Join Dave and Bethlie as they embark on this multi-part series on the book Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp. What is the point of the book? It is written to parents with children of any age and provides perspectives and procedures for shepherding your child’s heart into the paths of life. Several things stand out in Part 1 His comments about Behavior on page 4 If behavior becomes our only focus, we miss an important part of training “Parents often get sidetracked with behavior. If your goal in discipline is changed behavior, it is easy to understand why this happens. . . . You think you have corrected when you have changed unacceptable behavior to behavior that you sanction and appreciate. “What is the problem? You ask. The problem is this: Your child’s needs are far more profound than his aberrant behavior . . . If you are to really help him, you must be concerned with the attitudes of heart that drive his behavior. “ “A change in behavior that does not stem from a change in heart is not commendable; it is condemnable.” Don’t miss the balance there . . . “What must you do in correction and discipline? You must require proper behavior. God’s law demands that. You cannot, however, be satisfed to leave the matter there. You must help your child . . . expose the attitude of the heart that has resulted in wrong behavior.” A few suggestions from be and Bethlie If your child is younger, behavior is the first priority. They don’t understand yet, but you can’t wait until they have the capacity to reason and think. You will be way behind if you do. So go ahead and focus on their behavior. Give me your attention. As they then begin to grow and understand, you can then begin working on their heart. Give me your heart His comments about influences that shape who a person is and what they become as a result What are the influences? Structure of their family life Family Values Illustration of Vases or Disobedience on p 12 Family Roles Family Conflict Resolution Family Response to Failure Family History What are the mistakes we often make regarding these influences? We assume they are just helpless victims because of their We assume they are unaffected by their experiences We rely on determinism: if the environment is right, the kid will turn out right We have to remember that the clay is not passive This is why the heart is so important
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Books That Can Help...and Why Part 2
Join Dave and Bethlie as they continue a study on a few select chapters of the book Ten Pillars of an Awesome Marriage by Charles Shoemaker. PART 2 5. Chapter 5 Conflict Resolution Goal - not to avoid but to handle wisely Illustration of Lady Astor to Winston Churchill - If you were my husband, I would give you poison; if you were my wife, I would take it! P. 85 Swindoll Quote Frequently, marital warfare is in the trenches of belligerence or moodiness. Some battles are night attacks or surprise assaults. Others are cold wars of stoic silence. Cruel methods of torture are also employed—public criticism, fearful threats, intimidation, ugly sarcasm, and hateful remarks designed to put down one’s mate. Such tactics are popular . . . but wrong because they are unfair and they never lead to domestic peace.” P. 87 PFS - personal filtering system Age Gender Education Life experiences Culture Temperament Skills Personality Spirituality How do you resolve conflicts Be right with God Be swift to hear and slow to speak Own it when you are wrong Stay focused on issue at hand Face conflicts with a team mindset We not me A marriage struggles when it has two “I”s
A weekly podcast hosted by Dave and Bethlie Young who have spoken to thousands of people across America and around the world. Their heart is to encourage, direct, and strengthen your marriage, family, and ministry life.
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