No Guilt Mom | Overcoming Mom Guilt, Parenting Tips, & Self Care for Moms

New here? Start with our Start Here playlist — five episodes that will change how you think about motherhood.

Have you ever found yourself praying for rain — just so every activity gets cancelled and your family has an excuse to stay home in pajamas?

You're not alone. And according to today's guest, that fantasy might actually be the start of something important.

Christine Gunderson is a former TV news anchor, Capitol Hill press secretary, and now a novelist. Her latest book, Behind White Picket Fences, follows three moms who decide to drop out of the exhausting cycle of activities, expectations, and busyness for an entire year — and discover that the picture-perfect life they were chasing might not be what it seems.

In this episode, JoAnn and Christine talk about where the relentless pressure on moms actually comes from, how it's shifted over generations, and why the friendships you build in the carpool line might be the thing that gets you through it all.

What you'll learn:

Why more is expected of mothers than any other group of people — and why no human being can actually do it all

The "what if we just stopped?" question that inspired Christine's latest novel

How the expectations placed on moms have shifted from a perfect house in the 1960s to a perfect, overscheduled childhood today

Why travel sports have created a level of pressure and cost that didn't exist a generation ago — and why opting out can feel like failing your kid

The real reason behind the relentless busyness: fear of an unknowable future for our kids

What Christine learned from interviewing women in their 80s about what motherhood was actually like in 1965 (and why it wasn't the easier, simpler time we imagine)

Why honoring both the choice to stay home and the choice to work matters — because every mom does what makes sense for her family

The one thing that gets moms through the hardest seasons: female friendship and community

Christine's most important message for every overwhelmed mom listening

"I think more is expected of mothers than any other group of people on the planet — because we are expected to civilize, teach, and nurture an entire generation while simultaneously cooking healthy meals, keeping a clean house, and having a full-time job. There is no way any human being can do all the things women are expected to do."

"You are a great mom. And we cannot do this alone. You've got to have people walking beside you in the trenches."

Behind White Picket Fences

Three moms who barely know each other decide to drop out of the exhausting cycle of activities and expectations for one year — and discover their picture-perfect cul-de-sac is hiding secrets dating back to 1965. A thriller about motherhood, friendship, and what we've really gained (and lost) since our mothers' generation.

Available now wherever books are sold.

Resources mentioned:

Behind White Picket Fences by Christine Gunderson — available now

Join the No Guilt Mom Inner Circle to join book club with Christine

Listen next:

Why You're Killing It on Paper But Empty on the Inside with Brooke Taylor

Remember: the best mom is a happy mom. Take care of you.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New here? Start with our Start Here playlist — five episodes that will change how you think about motherhood.

You've tried the bins. You've tried the labels. You've watched the organization reels and bought the matching containers. And somehow, within a week, everything is a mess again.

Here's what nobody told you: you're not messy. You've just been trying to use an organizing system built for someone else's brain.

Cas Aarssen is a professional organizer, YouTube creator, and self-described recovering super slob. After years of failing at traditional organizing methods, she discovered that there are four distinct organizing styles — and once you know yours, staying organized becomes almost effortless. She's helped millions of people transform their homes by working with their brain, not against it.

What you'll learn:

Why traditional organizing systems fail ADHD and visual brains — and what to do instead

The one question every organizing system should answer: does it work on your absolute worst day?

The four Clutterbug organizing styles and how to figure out which one you are

Why out of sight truly is out of mind for visual organizers — and why that's not a flaw

The golden Clutterbug rule for shared spaces that stops the nagging and resentment cold

How to start with your messiest spot and let your clutter tell you what system you actually need

Why hooks, big labels, and no-lid bins work better than any fancy organizing system you can buy

How to have the organizing conversation with your partner without it turning into a fight

Why clutter attracts clutter — and the simple fix that breaks the cycle

The Lego mat that will change your life (and your kids' cleanup habits)

The 4 Clutterbug organizing styles:


The Butterfly — visual and macro. Needs things out in the open to remember they exist. Out of sight truly is out of mind. Loves beautiful displays, hates hidden storage.


The Bee — visual and micro. Needs to see things but also loves detailed organization. Color-coded files, labeled everything, things arranged just so.


The Ladybug — hidden and macro. Likes things put away out of sight but in big broad categories, not detailed systems. The hider who shoves things in a drawer to clear a surface.


The Cricket — hidden and micro. Loves detailed, out-of-sight storage. The person with the color-coordinated filing cabinet who knows exactly where everything is.

"True organization is meant for your absolute worst day — so that you never have to catch up."

Products mentioned in this episode:


Lego play mat with drawstring — spreads out as a huge play surface, pull the string and everything collects into a bag. Find on Amazon. Life changing for kids' cleanup.


Wall-mounted magazine rack or gold basket organizer — gets papers and bills off flat surfaces and onto walls where visual organizers will actually see them


Ikea bathroom rod system with hanging buckets — keeps bathroom products off the counter and at eye level without taking up surface space

Take the free Clutterbug quiz:

Find out your organizing style and get personalized tips at clutterbug.me

Resources mentioned:

The Clutterbug Method — Cas's new course for organizing your own home with her coaching. Find it at clutterbug.me

Peter Walsh's Clean Sweep on TLC — the show that started Cas's organizing journey

Connect with Cas:

Website: clutterbug.me

YouTube: Clutterbug

Instagram: @clutterbug_me

Listen next:

Why You're Always the One Remembering Everything (And How AI Can Help) with Sarah Dooley

Why You're Always Rushing — And What Your Body Is Actually Trying to Tell You with Jenna Free

Working Parent Boundaries with Sarah Armstrong

Remember: the best mom is a happy mom. Take care of you.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New here? Start with our Start Here playlist — five episodes that will change how you think about motherhood.

The Yelling Series:

Part 1: Why You Keep Yelling Even When You Promised Yourself You'd Stop

Part 2: Why Your Body Starts the Yelling Before Your Brain Does (And How to Stop It)


Part 3: Why What You Do After You Yell Matters More Than the Yelling Itself — you're here

You already know the guilt that comes after you yell. This episode is about what to do instead of drowning in it.

In the finale of the Yelling Series, JoAnn shares the complete three-step repair framework — the exact words to say to your child after you lose it, why repair actually builds a stronger relationship than perfection ever could, and how to close the loop in under a minute so everyone can move forward.

Because here's what the research on attachment tells us: it's not the yelling that causes long-term harm. It's the absence of repair. And once you know how to repair well, everything changes.

What you'll learn:

Why rupture and repair from attachment theory means the yelling itself is not what damages your relationship — and what actually does

Why a mom who repairs consistently is doing something a mom who never yells but never addresses conflict cannot do

Step 1: How to apologize simply and specifically — and the one word that destroys every apology (hint: it's "but")

Step 2: How to take complete ownership of your behavior without letting your child off the hook or making them defensive

Step 3: How to say what you'll work on in the future — and why promising effort instead of perfection is the only promise you can actually keep

What all three steps sound like together in one real conversation — under a minute, no drama required

How to teach your kids to apologize without ever telling them to — just by modeling it yourself

What to do if your child isn't ready to respond right away after your repair

Why if you've been yelling for a while, it'll take time for your kids to trust the change — and why that's completely okay

"It's not yelling that causes most of the issues in relationships. It's the absence of repair. When repair exists, everything gets better. That's what creates the long-term relationship."

🎁 Free resource: DM JoAnn the word REPAIR on Instagram @noguiltmom to get the full 3-step framework and all the example phrases in one free guide — no notes required.

Want to go deeper?

The No Guilt Mom Inner Circle is where these real changes happen. Moms come in feeling horrible about themselves as parents and leave with the tools, confidence, and community to actually do things differently. The Lotus curriculum walks you through your own reactions, communication, and commitment to change — all guided and supported. Learn more here.

Remember: the best mom is a happy mom. Take care of you.

Thank you to our sponsors!

Rula patients typically pay $15 per session when using insurance. Connect with quality therapists and mental

health experts who specialize in you at https://www.rula.com/NGM #rulapod
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New here? Start with our Start Here playlist — five episodes that will change how you think about motherhood.

You've hit the milestones. You've built the career, shown up for your kids, and done everything right. So why does it still feel like you're not enough?

If you're a high-achieving mom who looks successful on paper but feels empty, restless, or like you're always chasing the next thing — this episode is for you. And the answer isn't doing more. It's understanding what's actually driving your ambition in the first place.

Brooke Taylor is a career coach, speaker, and former marketing lead at Google, where she worked with some of the highest-performing teams in the world. After running a study of over 5,000 women, she discovered that burnout, perfectionism, and imposter syndrome weren't the real problem — they were all symptoms of something deeper she calls the success wound.

What you'll learn:

What the success wound is — and why it's the real reason no matter how much you achieve, it never feels like enough

The early childhood experience that teaches high-achieving girls to tie love and belonging to performance

The five archetypes of the success wound — and how to spot which one is driving your behavior

The difference between ambition plugged into your success wound versus ambition plugged into your true self

Why confidence is contextual and will always let you down — and what to build instead

What high-achieving moms are unintentionally modeling to their kids about self-worth and achievement

Why rewarding effort is good but rewarding resilience is the next level — and what that looks like in practice

The three daily practices that build self-worth like deposits in a bank account

Why making decisions when you're only 51% sure is actually the key to trusting yourself

Why certainty is a career killer — and what to do instead

"You don't rise to the level of your confidence. You fall to the level of your self-worth. Which is why you can be confident at work, have a big failure, and have your confidence crumble completely."

Resources mentioned:


Healing the Success Wound by Brooke Taylor — brooketaylorcoaching.com/book

Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy — the framework behind the "true self" concept discussed in this episode

The Four Cs framework from Dr. Benjamin Hardy — commitment, courage, competence, and confidence (you only need the first two to start)

Connect with Brooke:

Website: brooketaylorcoaching.com

Instagram: @brookevtaylor

Remember: the best mom is a happy mom. Take care of you.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New here? Start with our Start Here playlist — five episodes that will change how you think about motherhood.

The Yelling Series:

Part 1: Why You Keep Yelling Even When You Promised Yourself You'd Stop


Part 2: Why Your Body Starts the Yelling Before Your Brain Does (And How to Stop It) — you're here

Part 3: Why What You Do After You Yell Matters More Than the Yelling Itself

You've tried counting to ten. You've tried breathing. You've read the books, you've watched the reels, and you still yell. What if it's not about trying harder — what if something else entirely is going on in your body?

In Part 2 of the Yelling Series, JoAnn goes deeper than the standard coping advice. Your body starts the yelling before your brain even knows what's happening — and for some moms, the tools just don't work because the root cause isn't a mindset problem at all.

This episode covers the physical mechanics of yelling, a breathing practice to try right now, and a deeply personal conversation about hormones, neurodiversity, and why so many women have been left without answers for far too long.

What you'll learn:

Why the rushing feeling Jenna Free talked about on Tuesday is your body's earliest warning signal — and what to do the moment you notice it

The relationship between time and stress — and the reframe from The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks that will change how you talk about not having enough time

Box breathing: what it actually is, how to practice it, and why it only works if you catch yourself early enough

JoAnn's personal story of going on hormone replacement therapy — and how it eliminated her migraines, fixed her sleep, and gave her energy back

Why so many women's symptoms (stiff shoulders, anxiety, waking at 3am, mood swings) are being treated individually when the underlying cause is estrogen

The progesterone and sleep connection that nobody talks about enough

Why women with ADHD experience perimenopausal symptoms up to 10 years earlier than the general population

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) — what it is, how it shows up in parenting, and why knowing about it keeps JoAnn calm when her kids reject her boundaries

Why if somatic tools aren't working for you, it is not you — and what might actually be going on

"If the tools aren't working, it might not be you. It might be hormones, neurodiversity, or biology that's worth investigating. You deserve to have the best relationships and best life possible — free of the guilt."

Note: JoAnn's hormone story is shared from personal experience only and is not intended as medical advice. Please consult your own healthcare provider about any health concerns.

Resources mentioned:


The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks — the time reframe JoAnn references in this episode


Dr. Mary Claire Haver on the Armchair Expert podcast — perimenopause and menopause episode

ADDitude Magazine article: Study: Perimenopausal Symptoms Are More Severe, Begin Earlier in Women with ADHD

Tuesday's episode with Jenna Free: Why You're Always Rushing — And What Your Body Is Actually Trying to Tell You

Remember: the best mom is a happy mom. Take care of you.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices