Not Your Mother‘s Book Club

Bestiality, Incest, and Greek Mythology, oh my!

We made a list and checked it twice and can now verify that ALL of our smutz are on the naughty list this year. But no coal! No, no. We have something special for our naughty smutz! What do you get when you cross Home on the Range, Barnyard, and just a hint of bestiality? Tune in this week while we read Mistletoe for my Minotaur by Honey Philips to find out. Will it be hot and frosty or warm and willing? Only Gwyneth can tell. As Chef Boyardee once said, Bada-Bing, Bada-Boom, Bada-Bang. Who doesn't love a lil wolverine style?

Kefir, Jane Goodall, and Being Self-Aware, oh my!

Boo! We'reeeee backkkkkk! Les-be honest... who didn't miss us? We heard your orgasmic screams from beyond the grave and your ladies have risen to satisfy all your naughty creepy cravings. Is it Twilight? Would Jane Goodall approve? Will you bounce on it? Only time will tell. Tune in for this spooky bonus episode where we read Contract Bound by Elle Mae... or else. Don't wanna piss off the lesbians. - Jane Goodall

Smack, Smack, and Smack, oh my! 

Make sure to say it three times cause you’ve never had a pumpkin spice cum shot like this before…seeds and all. Stuff me like a turkey and call me Gord cause Holly Wilde is munchin’ this pumpkin pie with the novel Hallowpeen. Jerk my Jack-o-lantern and bob on my butternut balls cause this threesome is about to seed you deep and seed you good.

Veggie tales, Veggie porn, and Vageggies, oh my!

Calling all smuts for a very special surprise bonus episode! Who knew fanfiction could be this hot? Mikayla sure didn't. RIP Max Goof and may Natalie Dormer spare us all. Join us this week as NYT bestselling author Olivie Blake tells us what makes a man hot and why we need more bitches, while your mistresses tell you what veggies we would put in our holes. Fun times.

Shrimp, Fingers, and God, oh my! 

Well put a “hypothetical” diaper on me and let me jump out a goddamn “hypothetical” window cause it’s the “hypothetical” finale “hypothetical” bitchessss! These dysentery queens mean business and God (the magic 8 ball) has spoken so we must read A Legend in the Baking by Jamie Wesley. Dharma "hypothetically" smells of hummus, raindrops, and dreams and Mikayla, without a millimeter of a doubt, has mouth musk…”hypothetically". #ABDH (If you know you know!)