LOVERS by shan

• S2 Ep123: I Wanted My Man, Not the Sex: Tamsen Fadal on Losing Her Libido At the Worst Possible Time

  Have you ever wondered where your libido went? In this episode we do a deep dive on sexual slumps, low libido and lack of sexual desire that is frustrating (lack of desire that is not frustrating is not a problem!). We get to have this conversation first from the lens of Emmy-winning journalist Tamsen Fadal whose journey with low libido started in perimenopause and peaked on her honeymoon! From hot flashes and brain fog in the newsroom to bedroom low sex drive, Tamsen has become treasured for pulling back the curtain on midlife like never before. In this honest and empowering episode, menopause advocate Tamsen joins Shan for a conversation about menopause, sex drive and embracing life’s shifts. Tamsen shares how a one-word note from her doctor "menopause...?" set off a journey she wasn’t prepared for, and how that diagnosis impacted her body, her identity, and her intimacy. From tough talks with her husband to the quiet shame so many women carry through midlife transitions, Tamsen reminds us that getting older isn’t the end of our sensual selves, it can actually be the beginning. In part two of this episode we are giving you a MasterClass on low libido led by three doctors: OBGYN Dr. Mickey, lifestyle medical physician Dr Lean AND Pelvic Floor expert Dr. Janelle Frederick aka the Vagina Rehab Doctor. This is a highlight of our hour and fifteen convo if you’d like to listen to the rest go to Loversbyshan.com/community  Follow Tamsen on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/tamsenfadal Get her book How to Menopause Listen to her podcast The Tamsen Show Checkout her website https://www.tamsenfadal.com/ 

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• S2 Ep122: Go Where you are Celebrated, Not Just Tolerated ft. Kennedy Ryan

  From fatphobia to racism to ageism and ableism, Kennedy challenges the norms around love, desirability, and who gets to be the “main character.” This one’s for anyone who's ever felt left out of the story — and is ready to take the pen back. Bestselling romance author Kennedy Ryan (Before I Let Go, Reel) sits down with Shan to talk about what happens when women stop shrinking themselves to be chosen. From rewriting the stories we’ve inherited about sex, love, and partnership — to questioning why women with standards get labeled as “too much” Kennedy opens up about what radical self-worth actually looks like, and why romance should always center women’s pleasure. This episode is a love letter to anyone who’s ever been made to feel like they’re asking for too much. Kennedy shares her love story of being married to Sam for over 20 years while raising their autistic son.  This episode is sponsored by Lovers by Shan. Join the community today: https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Follow Kennedy on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/kennedyryan1 Get her latest book https://kennedyryanwrites.com/ Get a weekly love letter from me: https://www.loversbyshan.com/newsletter

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• S2 Ep121: Having the Sex I’d Want My Daughter to Expect with Xosha

  What kind of stories do we pass down through the way we love? Actor and mom Xosha Roquemore sits down with Shan to talk about sex, self-worth, and how becoming a mother shifted everything. It starts with one question she asked that stopped us both: “Have the kind of sex you’d be proud to tell your daughter about.” We talk about the early messages she got about sex, how sexual coercion showed up in her past, and why that experience still needs more language. She shares a fun one-night stand story and how even casual sex can feel good when it comes from choice, not pressure. Xosha also talks about single motherhood, not as a hardship, but as a privilege. Being a mom has made her sharper, clearer, and way more intentional about who gets access to her. This episode is sponsored by Lovers by Shan. Join the community today! https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Follow Xosha on socials https://www.instagram.com/xoshro/ Get a Weekly Lovers Letter from Me https://www.loversbyshan.com/newsletter

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• S2 Ep120: It Doesn’t End With Him - Jessie Woo on Love and Pursuing Great Sex After Sexual Assault

  Reclaiming Intimacy: Jessie Woo’s Journey Beyond Trauma. Comedian and media personality Jessie Woo joins Shan for a powerful conversation about healing, love, and rediscovering sexual joy after surviving sexual assault. Jessie shares her painful story of her assault and her joyful story of her relationship with Jay Allen aka Mr Easter. Now Jessie is on the path to reclaiming pleasure and building healthy relationships, offering hope and practical insights for anyone on their own journey of recovery. This episode explores the complexities of intimacy after trauma, the importance of self-love, and why your story doesn’t end with someone else’s actions. At the end of the episode, trauma expert Jimanekia Eborn joins us to discuss why sexual assault is a community issue plus she give her hot take on the Diddy trial and some people’s harmful comments about Cassie.  How do you reclaim love and pleasure after trauma? How do you support survivors in your life? We discuss these questions PLUS we have a free resource for sexual assault survivors and those navigating grief called The Grief Registry. Content Warning: This episode discusses sexual assault and trauma. Listener discretion is advised. If you or someone you know is a survivor of sexual assault, resources and support are available. Visit RAINN.org or call 800-656-HOPE. Thank You Jessie Woo https://www.instagram.com/thejessiewoo/ Jess a Couple Things Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmu_OLDekKoPr-TgAY8lYIg Get a Weekly Lovers Letter from Me https://www.loversbyshan.com/newsletter Lovers Community If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community, click here to join the waitlist: https://www.loversbyshan.com/community

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• S2 Ep119: Death, Love and Grieving What’s Still Here featuring Alessia Cara

  Nothing good lasts. Right? In this deeply moving episode, Canadian singer-songwriter Alessia Cara joins Shan Boodram to explore the connection between intimacy, loss, and the fear of death (thanatophobia). Inspired by her song "Sublime" from Love and Hyperbole, Alessia opens up about her personal journey with grief and how it shapes the way she loves and creates. Together, they dive into universal questions: How do we hold on to love while letting go of control? How does the fear of loss impact our relationships, intimacy, and even our everyday choices? Esther Perel talks about how desire and loss can sit right next to each other. This made me think about how those ideas show up in everyday relationships: the death of connection, the slow fading of intimacy, or the fear that something we’ve built might not last. When you zoom out, so much of how we attach, how we love, and even how we have sex is shaped by that deeper fear, what happens if I lose this? Or if I lose you? Or if I lose me in this? Thank You Alessia Cara http://alessiacara.com https://www.instagram.com/alessiasmusic https://www.youtube.com/@alessiacara Thanks Dame for sponsoring this episode: Dame makes products designed to enhance intimacy and connection—whether you’re with a partner or flying solo.  http://dame.com/shan Dame Coupon: SHAN15 Join My Mailing List https://www.loversbyshan.com/newsletter Lovers Community If you’re interested in joining the Lovers community, click here to join the waitlist: https://www.loversbyshan.com/community

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