Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women

"Is your dick going to be synced to porn?"
That's not hypothetical — it's already on the market. Here, intimacy expert Susan Bratton walks me through "weird" phenomena at the frontier of sex tech and AI, including synchronized strokers, tele-dildonics (I'll bet that's a word you've never come across before), role-player game (RPG) worlds where you can get down and dirty with an Aztec warrior woman, and adaptive AI that learns what gets you off and gives you more of it.
But where does this genuinely help? And where can it quietly wreck your dopamine system and/or real-world relationships? We delve into all of it, including the exact device suite that Susan and her boyfriend use for long-distance sex. Imagine being thousands of miles apart, still having synchronized orgasms on video. (I did not expect the "hard-boiled egg" comparison, but you'll get it once you hear it.)
Plus:
How a woman can regnerate her vaginal tissue (YES, this helps if she's dry after/during perimenopause/menopause)
The 96% statistic about what most porn is actually showing you
The ancient technique that separates orgasm from ejaculation
Why penis pumps are not the cheesy novelty you think they are

And a fundamental truth that Susan and I agree on: The best sex tech in the world means nothing without the communication skills underneath it. Plus what I consider the quote of the episode: "I want to live forever and fuck till I die!"
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Come to the retreat!
As of this recording, we have 4 spots left for our Labor Day weekend retreat! Sept 3-7th in Northern California (about 2 hrs north of SF). We work hard to keep it financially accessible, and payment plans are available.
As one man says, "If you're thinking about going, you're already there."
https://evolutionary.men/retreat/
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Work with us
Ready to go deeper than the podcast and take action? Jason and I will help you break old patterns and transform your sex & love life for good. To see if you're a fit for our flagship program, Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)
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Mentioned on this episode:
Please Her In Bed (Melanie's streaming course on how to talk about sex with women in a way that actually helps them to open up): www.pleaseherinbed.com
Drive Desire (Susan's full toy/device library): www.drivedesire.com
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Memorable quotes from this episode:
"No one's ever given her these types of strokes before."
"They don't want you addicted to the yoni. They want you addicted to the screens."
"Your dick is a tongue, not a piston."
"You don't owe me an ejaculation."
"How's your hoo-ha doing?"
"When you are a turned-on woman or a turned-on man, you're turned on to life."
"Your sexual vitality and your vitality are two sides of the same coin."

“I was nervous as hell.”
So shares one of the men in this episode about how he felt stepping onto the land of our in-person retreat. In another's words, “I went into a panic because I’m having flashbacks of summer camp.”
What's it really like to do live men's work?
The truth is, most men that come to live retreats are intimidated in one way or another. Rates of bullying are astronomically high, and you don't always know what to expect. As another put it, “There’s a shared understanding of the brutality between men.” And, “When I was a boy, there was never any spiritual or deep, emotional holding by men in my life.”
But you can write -- and experience -- a different story. You can have a new experience of brotherhood ... and what that makes possible may be something you've never even considered.
In one man's words, “The dynamic within my whole family has changed.” Another said, “There’s now a level of connection now with my wife that I can’t even describe.”
If you'e ever felt like you didn't fit in as a kid, or you're just plain curious about how our retreat has impacted other men, listen on. There can be kind and loving experiences of masculine love.
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Come to the retreat!
As of this recording, we have 4 spots left! It's over Labor Day weekend, Sept 3-7th in Northern California (about 2 hours north of SF). We work hard to keep it financially accessible, and payment plans are available.
Or as one man said, “If you’re thinking about going, you’re already there.”
https://evolutionary.men/retreat/
---
Work with us
Want to go deeper than the podcast? Jason and I are ready to work with you! We specialize in helping men break old patterns and transform their sex & love lives for good.
To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)
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Memorable quotes from this episode:
"I wanted to be vulnerable and open, but I didn’t know how, and I wasn’t sure I could.”
“I was deathly afraid to become a terrible father.”
“I cried tears of joy for the first time in my life.”
“I realized — through all the work I’ve been doing, therapy, self-reflection, etc. — how much love I have for myself (finally).”
“If we’re gonna talk about this trauma, we might as well do it in the hot tub!”
“There was racism even within my own church.”
“I can accept other men’s unconditional love, and it helped me know how to provide unconditional love to other men.”
“I came into the first retreat a very tough nut to crack.”
“There is hope with change.”
“You’ll make friends.”
“Come for the food; stay for the healing.”
“You WILL experience a transformation.”
“Just get there.”

Have you ever felt like your woman was routinely frustrated, resentful, or annoyed with you? Like you can't get anything right, and then on top of that, when it comes to sex or physical intimacy, FORGET about it. Not happening.
If so, you may be contending with reverse polarity. This can happen in either direction, but we find that with our clients, it's illuminating to explore the flavor when a man is more in omega (his feminine) and a woman more in her alpha (her masculine).
Here, we delve into the different stages of relationship as they relate to polarity (original concept by author and thought leader David Deida.) We also get into what to DO about reverse polarity. How do you re-polarize a relationship if you haven't been very polarized lately?
The focus, as always, is how we can grow into sexier, more fulfilling relationships on both sides.
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Come to the Retreat!
We've still got 7 spots left as of this episode dropping! Sept 3-7th, NorCal. www.evolutionary.men/retreat
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Work with us
Ready to go deeper than the podcast? Our flagship program, Pillars of Presence, is where it all happens. You can join anytime -- book a call at www.evolutionary.men/apply.
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Mentioned on this episode:
No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover

Ever feel like you're doing everything "right" — showing up, being kind, respecting her — but only getting crumbs?
First dates that never turn into second dates. A marriage where you've quietly become roommates; no matter what you do, there's no sex, and there's not even very much affection. That feeling of putting in a ton of effort and still spinning your wheels.
If any of that lands, you're likely living out some version of Nice Guy Syndrome.
Outgrowing being a Nice Guy doesn't mean becoming a jerk. It does mean that you learn some skills or make some shifts you've maybe never even thought of before.
Here, Jason and I break down the 3 specific things that support men in graduating from being a Nice Guy — the ones that take them from stuck to, "Wait, this actually works now?"
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Come to the Retreat!
Join us live in Boonville, CA (near Napa) in early September. As of this episode dropping, we've got 8 spots left. www.evolutionary.men/retreat
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Work with us
Ready to go deeper? Our flagship program, Pillars of Presence, is where men transform. Book a call at www.evolutionary.men/apply.
—
Mentioned on this episode:
No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover
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Memorable quotes from this episode:
"I'm trying really fucking hard and I'm not winning anywhere in it."
"No woman can trust your yes if you do not have the capacity to say no."
"You can't get better at community without being in community."
"If shame is getting in the way of that, she doesn't have a chance to shine."

How much does a woman's sexual satisfaction depend on the size, shape, or other physical details of your cock?
According to research out of the UK, this question is on the hearts of a lot of men. To quote this study: "Men showed significant dissatisfaction with penile size, despite perceiving themselves to be of average size."
In other words, it's common, if you're a man, to wonder (or worry) about whether size matters.
Now here's the real question: Do women that sleep with men track this, and if so, how much?
The truth is that there's as much diversity in the world of penises as there is in the world of human beings. And as women who have sex with men, we've seen a whole bunch! Here, we get real about sex, relationships, hookups, play, and cock size.
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Join us!
We've got a few spots left at our live, in-person retreat, September 3rd–7th — five days of embodiment, brotherhood, and doing the work that will actually move the needle. Get in here: https://evolutionary.men/retreat
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Mentioned on this episode:
Please Her In Bed, my streaming course: www.pleaseherinbed.com