That Peter Crouch Podcast

On this week’s episode of That Peter Crouch Podcast, Pete, Sids and Chris dive headfirst into one of the wildest Listener Mail episodes yet — and absolutely nothing is off limits. From pink eye, polyps and footballers wearing makeup on live TV… to whether finishing SECOND deserves an open-top bus parade, the lads somehow manage to cover it all.

There’s chaos as the boys debate if modern football has officially gone soft, including refs with trendy haircuts, xG nerds, shirt-off celebrations, and whether heading could eventually disappear from the game entirely. Plus, a listener’s all-time “Games Gone” rant sparks one of the funniest football debates they’ve had in ages.

Elsewhere, Pete reveals his secret childhood career working in his grandad’s butcher shop, the Wealdstone Raider officially dumps Chris for Crouchy, and there’s an unbelievable story involving someone legally named after the entire 1979 Liverpool team.

The lads also react to bizarre old-school footballer tweets, discuss marathon punishments for the Football League, rank Aussie icons in a “Down Under Vanarama,” and preview the FA Cup Final with the help of Chris’ wife Ria — who might actually be better at predictions than all three of them combined.

It’s listener mail at its absolute finest: ridiculous football chat, nostalgia, complete nonsense, and plenty of classic pod chaos.

Chumbawamba

00:00 - Intro, makeup chat & Chris’ pink eye reveal
03:15 - Polyps, bllocks & why the lads do this to themselves
04:27 - Fans listening to the pod on the London Underground
05:12 - Shin pad injury update & the listener who got slashed
06:02 - Does SECOND place deserve an open-top bus parade?
07:18 - Playoff winners vs automatic promotion debate
08:50 - The Wealdstone Raider officially dumps Chris
10:22 - Will the Wealdstone Raider come on the podcast?
11:45 - Sponsored Segment with England
15:52 - Download the England app!
19:01 - Listener Mail officially begins
19:21 - The unbelievable football shirt sent from Vanuatu
20:48 - The lads decide to give the shirt away
21:24 - Aussie caravans & the “Down Under Vanarama”
25:31 - Steve Irwin, Alf Stewart & Toadfish in a Vanarama
26:51 - Sids loses it at “Beanpole, Fire Pbes and One Ball”
27:18 - Serious chat about checking yourself & men’s health
29:31 - A listener legally named after Liverpool’s 1979 team
30:43 - Charlie Otway’s insane full name explained
31:58 - Marathon punishment ideas for the Football League
34:58 - The funniest accidental footballer tweets ever
36:44 - “Games Gone” mega-rant begins
37:11 - Referees with trendy haircuts debate
37:29 - xG, “big chances” & football nerd culture
38:19 - Shirt-off celebrations & VAR frustrations
39:00 - Why clubs keep buying young foreign players
39:20 - Is football removing physical contact from the game?
40:23 - Players showing personality vs media backlash
42:49 - Football League table update & Ria’s prediction success
45:24 - FA Cup Final preview: Chelsea vs Manchester City
47:42 - Paddy Power’s Minister of Mischief returns
49:32 - Has Chris replaced the listeners with his wife?
50:53 - Ria gives her FA Cup predictions
52:28 - The lads react to Ria outperforming them
54:30 - Why the FA Cup Final morning feels special
57:00 - Predictions: Man United vs Forest & Newcastle vs West Ham
58:37 - Paddy’s Boost selections
01:01:18 - Outro
The Official England squad drops May 22nd on the England App first - if you want to see who is making Tuchel’s squad download the app here :https://england.onelink.me/rgxW/lbj1at4b

And if you want to be in with a chance of winning an official signed England shirt - submit your selects in the Squad Selector by May 21st . #ad

For more Peter Crouch:

Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch
Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch

For more Chris Stark

Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_Stark
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/

For more Steve Sidwell

Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14

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FROM THE VAULT: In this clip, Joe Cole joins the lads to reflect on the ruthless standards set by Jose Mourinho during Chelsea’s glory years, including the brutal lesson he learned after facing Ronaldinho and Barcelona at the Nou Camp.

Joe opens up on Mourinho’s obsession with tactical discipline, the fear factor inside the dressing room, and the savage man-management techniques that kept Chelsea’s squad on edge.

The former England international also shares hilarious stories from his first ever England call-up at just 18 years old, including meeting legends like David Beckham, Paul Scholes and Tony Adams, as well as witnessing Kevin Keegan resign after England’s defeat to Germany at the old Wembley.

Elsewhere, Joe breaks down one of football’s most painful and underappreciated jobs — being the designated “charger” in the wall — and why taking a free-kick to the face was sometimes the easy option.

If you enjoyed this clip, you can catch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/jBJh3GjgFUE

Chumbawamba

For more Peter Crouch:

Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch
Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch

For more Chris Stark

Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_Stark
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/

For more Steve Sidwell

Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14

#PeterCrouch #ThatPeterCrouchPodcast
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On this week’s 401st episode special of the Peter Crouch Podcast, Pete, Sids, and Chris celebrate hitting an unbelievable milestone… by completely losing control of the show.

First up is Portsmouth legend and cult hero Kit Man Kev, who delivers an all-time segment. From washing players’ kits for cash, to lifting sofas over balconies, to wild dressing room stories and boxing sessions with players — Kev gives a brutally honest take on how football has changed, why “the game’s gone,” and what modern players are missing.

Next in is Nortei Nortey, where the lads are immediately apologetic for a previous episode’s “funny name” antics… Nortei brings a different footballing perspective with stories from his career, connections to the lads, and a look into Dagenham & Redbridge’s recent takeover.

Then things take another left turn as Felix White (The Maccabees) joins — blending football, music, and podcasting worlds. There’s talk of FA Cup obsession, crossover culture, and even a cheeky callback to Crouchy previously slagging off his podcast… before Felix quite literally plays the episode out with a fantastic live musical moment.

No script, no structure — just three surprise guests, unbelievable stories, and a 401st episode special that proves sometimes the best episodes are the ones where nobody knows what’s coming next.

Chumbawamba

00:00 - Intro & 401 episode milestone explained
03:00 - Reflecting on podcast origins & early days
04:00 - The “Peteroni” glass reveal (long pint glass)
05:00 - First pour attempt goes horribly wrong
06:30 - Cheers to 401!
07:30 - Classic podcast memories & catchphrases
08:30 - Story: Crouch getting recognised post-retirement
09:30 - Glass-making video & behind-the-scenes reaction
11:30 - Attempting to “split the P”
13:00 - Format reveal: mystery guests with blindfolds
14:00 - Old VHS footage introduced
14:30 - Young Crouchy’s Chelsea interview clip reaction
15:30 - Ball boy footage & early career nostalgia
16:50 - Transition to first mystery guest
18:30 - Blindfold guessing begins
20:30 - Kev revealed: “heartbeat of Portsmouth”
23:00 - Early Crouch days: living alone & being looked after
24:30 - Sofa lifting through balcony story
26:00 - Kev’s backstory
30:30 - Stories about legendary players
32:30 - Dressing room fights & boxing stories
37:00 - “Game’s gone” discussion begins
38:30 - Modern football vs old-school mentality
40:00 - Smoking, culture & changes in football
41:30 - Tribute to Portsmouth fans & emotional goodbye
43:30 - Kev leaves & reaction from the lads
44:30 - Second guest teased
46:00 - Clues: football links, connections to hosts
48:00 - Identity slowly pieced together
49:00 - Nortei Nortey revealed
50:00 - Football journey & connections discussion
51:30 - Talking career paths & recent football experiences
53:00 - Banter about mutual links & teams
54:30 - Short but lively segment wraps up
55:30 - Third guest teased (non-football world hints)
56:00 - Clues: podcast, music, crossover with sport
57:45 - Big clue: FA Cup book reference
58:10 - Felix White revealed (The Maccabees)
01:05:00 - Felix White segment continues: football + music crossover chat
01:07:00 - Podcast banter & shared industry stories
01:08:30 - Felix reflects on football culture & storytelling
01:09:00 - Felix plays live music / plays the episode out 🎶
01:10:20 - Reactions to the performance & wrap-up with Felix
01:11:10 - Transition into Paddy Power segment
01:12:00 - “Wives Called” segment introduced
01:24:30 - Final laughs & wrapping the segment
01:28:11 - End of episode

Special thanks to Lumsdale Glass for the amazing Peteroni glasses: https://www.lumsdaleglass.co.uk/

For more Peter Crouch:

Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch
Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch

For more Chris Stark

Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_Stark
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/

For more Steve Sidwell

Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14

#PeterCrouch #ThatPeterCrouchPodcast
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FROM THE VAULT: In this clip, former Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale joined the lads to break down the evolving role of the modern goalkeeper and how the position has become more influential than ever. Ramsdale lifted the lid on his relationship with manager Mikel Arteta, explaining how he’s given responsibility to dictate play and make key decisions during build-up phases.

The conversation dives into the tactical details behind set pieces, including the increasingly popular “draft excluder” role, with Ramsdale offering a goalkeeper’s perspective on why it’s used, when it matters, and how it can impact the outcome of free kicks.

He also shares insight into communication within the squad, the intelligence of teammates like Martin Ødegaard, and the growing importance of goalkeepers in shaping a team’s overall strategy.

But most importantly… who was the most parched?

If you like this clip, you can catch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/b9ftLa8_nDU?si=ieykWFS-X11g78Sp

Chumbawamba

For more Peter Crouch:

Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch
Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch

For more Chris Stark

Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_Stark
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/

For more Steve Sidwell

Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14

#PeterCrouch #ThatPeterCrouchPodcast
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On this week’s episode of That Peter Crouch Podcast, Pete, Chris, and Sids are joined by Premier League legend James Milner — and it’s every bit as honest, chaotic, and insightful as you’d expect. From breaking appearance records to being labelled “boring,” Milner opens up on the mentality that’s kept him at the top for over two decades.

He takes us right back to his Leeds debut at just 16, the brutal dressing room culture that shaped him, and the surreal transition from academy kid to first-team regular. The conversation dives deep into his time at Newcastle and Aston Villa, before lifting the lid on the madness at Manchester City — big egos, training ground bust-ups, and the relentless fight to stay in the team amid £30m signings every summer.

Milner also shares incredible insight into Liverpool’s transformation under Jürgen Klopp — from early disappointments to building a title-winning machine — revealing the intensity, leadership, and culture that powered one of the most dominant teams in Premier League history.

There’s also plenty of classic pod chaos: dressing room pranks, wild fines, and stories that perfectly sum up why Milner is one of football’s most respected pros. After Milner departs, the lads wrap things up with a Paddy Power segment and this week’s Chaos Card, making some very questionable “phone a friend” calls…

Chumbawamba

00:00 - Intro, chaos & podcast return
00:14 - Testicular cancer awareness message
00:48 - Giveaway winner & merch chat
02:26 - Milner joins the pod
03:00 - “Boring Milner” label explained
03:38 - Breaking the appearance record
05:16 - Dealing with attention & praise
06:44 - Avoiding the limelight
08:12 - Fitness, longevity & elite standards
10:03 - Dad’s influence & mentality
10:36 - Old-school Leeds dressing room culture
12:18 - Leadership & helping younger players
14:46 - Debut at 16 for Leeds
16:01 - First team training shock
00:17:37 - Premier League debut story
19:29 - Dressing room pranks & chaos
21:41 - Earning respect as a young player
24:15 - Aston Villa move & failed transfer
26:29 - Villa form & career progression
29:00 - Playing 7 positions in one game
30:56 - Man City move & title-winning journey
33:25 - Big egos, fights & training chaos
37:02 - Aguero title moment reaction
39:11 - Liverpool move explained
42:19 - First impressions of Liverpool
45:51 - Klopp’s arrival & ruthless standards
47:19 - Intensity of Klopp training
50:10 - Personal connection & leadership
1:05:00 - Listener messages & wrap up
1:18:46 - Milner leaves the podcast
1:20:30 - Post-interview debrief with the lads
1:25:10 - Paddy Power segment
1:30:15 - Chaos Card: Phone a Friend begins
1:35:40 - Celebrity calls chaos & wrap-up
1:38:50 - Outro

For more Peter Crouch:

Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch
Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch

For more Chris Stark

Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_Stark
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/

For more Steve Sidwell

Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14

#PeterCrouch #ThatPeterCrouchPodcast
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