Modern Mom Probs

In this episode, Tara sits down with popular content creator of @ThatDarnChat, Fair Play Facilitator, and author of the new book No More Mediocre, Laura Danger for an honest, validating, and occasionally uncomfortably relatable conversation about domestic labor, mental load, and why so many partnerships quietly slide into mediocrity. They unpack how the pandemic cracked things wide open exposing just how uneven household responsibilities really are and why so many couples are still struggling to rebalance things years later. Spoiler: it’s not because anyone’s “bad at helping,” it’s because the entire concept of help is part of the problem. Laura and Tara dig into the cultural conditioning that shapes our expectations at home, from who notices what needs to be done to who feels responsible for making sure it gets done. They explore the difference between expectations and standards (yes, they are not the same thing), and how unmet expectations can quietly turn into resentment, disconnection, and even feelings of betrayal. The conversation also touches on why mediocre relationships are so often tolerated (and normalized) especially for women and mothers who were taught to lower the bar and keep the peace. Drawing from her book No More Mediocre, Laura makes a powerful case for intentionality in domestic roles and communication, emphasizing that equity doesn’t happen accidentally. Tara and Laura also reflect on how online conversations have helped name the mental load and bring language to something so many parents feel but couldn’t quite articulate. If you’ve ever felt exhausted by carrying the invisible work at home, or wondered why “just tell me what to do” isn’t the solution, this episode will make you feel seen, validated, and maybe a little fired up (in a good way). Links: https://www.lauradanger.com/ https://www.instagram.com/thatdarnchat/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode, Tara is joined by Dr. Kim Van Dusen, a marriage and family therapist, founder of The Parentologist, podcaster, and author of Parenting through Play: Creative Strategies for Building Better Behavior, Deeper Connection, and Positive Communication, who specializes in play therapy, for a conversation that feels equal parts validating and practical. They explore why play isn’t just “extra” in parenting. It’s essential. As parents, we tend to reach for conversation to connect, but kids speak a different language, and that language is play. Kim shares how breaking down our own barriers to play (time, guilt, exhaustion, the belief that we’re “bad at it”) can completely shift the parent–child relationship and create real connection, even in short, simple moments. Tara and Kim also talk about how play evolves as kids grow, and how it can be used strategically, even for things like behavior challenges, homework battles, and chore resistance. Kim explains how understanding what’s happening emotionally for our kids can dramatically improve behavior, and how playful approaches can reduce power struggles while lowering stress for everyone involved. The big takeaway? Play doesn’t have to be complicated to create connection. Sometimes the simplest activities have the biggest impact. Links: https://theparentologist.com/ https://www.instagram.com/theparentologist/ https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/parenting-through-play-kim-van-dusen-psyd/1148218068 Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this festive, laugh-out-loud episode, Tara is joined by Jackie Santillan and Priscilla Kavanaugh, hosts of the new We Say What podcast, for a cozy (and slightly chaotic) holiday roundtable that feels like catching up with friends over spiked cocoa. The trio swaps stories about how holiday traditions evolve as families grow, like coordinated outfits, holiday videos, and the never-ending question of whether sending Christmas cards is worth the time, money, or sanity. They also tackle holiday fashion (yes, buffalo plaid has officially taken over) and reflect on how modern motherhood adds a whole new layer to the “most wonderful time of the year.” Things really heat up when the conversation turns to holiday movies. Through a spirited bracket-style showdown, they debate classics like It’s a Wonderful Life, Christmas Vacation, A Christmas Story, and modern favorites like Elf. Along the way, they unpack why childhood staples like Home Alone, Rudolph, The Grinch, and even The Muppets hold such powerful emotional weight, and why nostalgia often decides the winner long before the final argument is made. The hosts also touch on how portrayals of family dynamics in older films can be both hilarious and… a little questionable. By the end, the episode becomes less about crowning the “best” Christmas movie and more about what these films represent: memories, traditions, and the comfort of revisiting stories that shaped us. With plenty of humor, friendly debate, and knowing nods to the holiday hustle, Tara, Jackie and Priscilla remind listeners that the magic of the season isn’t about doing it perfectly. It’s about taking time to enjoy special moments with our families. Links: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/we-say-what/id1856328887 https://www.instagram.com/wesaywhatpod/ https://www.instagram.com/itspkav/ https://www.instagram.com/kindminds_smarthearts/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode, Tara is joined by Devon Kuntzman, author of Transforming Toddlerhood: Your Essential Guide to Age 1-5, to talk about what’s really happening when a child loses it, and why so many of us feel completely stuck in those moments. Devon explains that when a child is at a “level 10,” they’re in a full stress response. This isn’t bad behavior or manipulation; it’s a nervous system in overdrive. When kids are this overwhelmed, they’re not capable of logic or reasoning, and they often don’t even fully know what they’re doing, which can be both frustrating and freeing for parents to understand. They also dig into why tantrums are not the time to lecture, punish, or try to make a point. No matter how calm or logical you think you’re being, a child in a tantrum simply can’t process it. Instead, Devon encourages parents to shift the goal from “teaching a lesson” to emotional regulation, starting with ourselves. When we understand our child’s brain state and bring awareness to the moment, we’re far more likely to help things settle rather than escalate. This conversation offers a compassionate, realistic approach to tantrums that helps parents feel less reactive, more regulated, and a whole lot less alone during that tricky period of toddlerhood. Links: https://www.transformingtoddlerhood.com https://www.transformingtoddlerhood.com/pre-order-book/ https://www.instagram.com/transformingtoddlerhood/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this fun solo episode, Tara dives into one of the most universal parts of family life: dinner time. From picky eaters to last-minute meal planning, Tara explores why dinner can feel like a juggling act. She reminds listeners that dinner doesn’t have to be Pinterest-perfect to be meaningful. Instead, it’s about presence, laughter, and creating small moments that bring your family closer together. Tara also shares practical strategies and her favorite tips to take the pressure off mealtime, from simplifying dinner plans to getting kids involved in the process. She emphasizes that lowering expectations can reduce stress and that predictability often helps children feel more comfortable at the table. At the end of the day, family dinners aren’t about flawless recipes. They’re about connection and showing up for one another.Tune in to hear how a shift in perspective can turn dinner from another thing on your to-do list into one of the most grounding moments of your family’s day. A special thank you to the sponsor of the video, New York Bakery, for being a busy parents mealtime sidekick and for helping Tara to remind her audience to embrace quality family time above all else. Where to buy New York Bakery dinnertime favorites: https://nybakery.com/where-to-buy/?utm_source=Podcast&utm_medium=Ambassador&utm_campaign=Modernmomprobs New York Bakery's Dinnertime Recipe Inspiration: https://www.instagram.com/thenybakery/https://www.tiktok.com/@thenybakery Check out Tara's interview with real parents about what matters most when it comes to dinnertime: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DQ20tidkaPd/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.