Just Breathe: Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen

• Beyond the Breath: The Distinction Between Niceness and Kindness

  The primary focus of today's discourse centers on the critical distinction between niceness and kindness, a topic that warrants deeper examination in our contemporary societal interactions. I have come to recognize that many of us have been conditioned to prioritize niceness—characterized by superficial politeness and the avoidance of conflict—over authentic kindness, which often necessitates uncomfortable honesty and proactive engagement. Through a thorough exploration of various real-life scenarios, I illustrate how niceness can perpetuate the status quo, while kindness demands action and advocacy, particularly for marginalized communities. We delve into the implications of these behaviors not only on personal relationships but also within broader contexts such as allyship and community engagement. Ultimately, I invite listeners to reflect on their own experiences and consider how they might navigate the delicate balance between being nice and being truly kind in their daily lives.A profound exploration unfolds as we delve into the intricate distinction between the concepts of niceness and kindness. Niceness, often perceived as a societal expectation, is fundamentally rooted in the desire to maintain comfort and avoid confrontation. It is characterized by superficial politeness and adherence to social norms, frequently masking insincerity. For instance, a common phrase such as 'I'm sorry you feel that way' exemplifies the pitfalls of niceness; it deflects responsibility and fails to address the underlying issues at hand. In stark contrast, kindness emanates from a place of genuine empathy and necessitates courage, often compelling individuals to engage in uncomfortable yet necessary conversations that challenge injustices. This episode invites listeners to reflect on their own experiences, urging them to recognize the moments when they opted for niceness over kindness, and to consider the emotional and ethical implications of such choices. We are encouraged to be proactive in our allyship, confronting uncomfortable truths rather than glossing over them with polite niceties, as we navigate the complexities of interpersonal relationships and societal dynamics.Takeaways: The distinction between being nice and being kind is crucial for fostering authentic relationships. Niceness often serves to maintain comfort and avoid conflict, whereas kindness involves taking action for others. Practicing kindness can lead to uncomfortable conversations, which are essential for allyship and advocacy. Clear communication is an essential component of kindness, as it fosters understanding and trust among individuals. Being kind requires us to challenge societal norms and engage in difficult discussions for the benefit of others. We must reflect on our past experiences of niceness versus kindness to better understand our behaviors. Links referenced in this episode:thetrevorproject.orgshowingupforracialjustice.orghumanrightscampaign.orgnami.orgConnect with Heather:Join the Just Breathe Community on PatreonGive a copy of Heather's new book, Parenting with...

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• Beyond the Breath: Exploring the Nuances of Judgment and Discernment

  The central theme of today's discourse revolves around the critical distinction between judgment and discernment, concepts that frequently become conflated yet possess markedly different ramifications on our interpersonal engagements. As we traverse the complexities of our contemporary societal landscape, it becomes increasingly imperative to cultivate discernment, particularly in light of the myriad distractions and emotional biases that often accompany judgment. I have undertaken a series of experimental formats in this new Friday edition, striving to refine our exploration of such profound topics. Throughout our discussion, we shall elucidate the definitions and implications of judgment and discernment, alongside practical methodologies for enhancing our discernment while mitigating judgment. This examination seeks not only to enhance our individual cognitive processes but also to foster deeper understanding and empathy within our communal interactions.Takeaways: The episode delves into the distinction between judgment and discernment, emphasizing their differing impacts on our interactions. Judgment is often rooted in biases and emotional responses, while discernment is connected to wisdom and objective reasoning. Mindfulness practices are essential for shifting from judgment to discernment, promoting conscious awareness in decision-making. The podcast highlights the importance of engaging with diverse perspectives to cultivate discernment over judgment in social contexts. Practicing metacognition allows individuals to reflect on their thought processes, aiding in the development of discernment. The episode encourages listeners to be mindful of their automatic judgments and to embrace curiosity as a means of fostering understanding. Connect with Heather:Join the Just Breathe Community on PatreonGive a copy of Heather's new book, Parenting with Pride. Join Heather's *free* Substack weekly newsletter Work with Heather one-on-one or bring her into your organization to speak or run a workshop!Please subscribe to, rate, and review Just Breathe. And, as always, please share with anyone who needs to know they are not alone!YouTubeTikTokEmail: [email protected] Mentioned in this episode:PatreonLearn more about the Just Breathe Community on PatreonPatreon

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• The Art of Authenticity in College Essays: A Conversation with Dyllen Nellis

  This podcast episode delves into the nuanced realm of college admissions, emphasizing the vital importance of authenticity in the application process. We engage in a profound discussion with Dyllen Nellis, a distinguished college admissions coach and founder of Next Gen Admit, who elucidates how students can effectively communicate their personal narratives and values in their applications. Dyllen advocates for a holistic approach, underscoring that grades and test scores, while significant, do not singularly determine a student’s admission prospects; rather, it is the unique story each applicant brings that truly captivates admissions committees. Throughout our dialogue, we explore strategies for nurturing intellectual curiosity in students, fostering their individual passions, and guiding them in articulating their authentic selves. By the conclusion of the episode, we aim to equip parents and students alike with invaluable insights into navigating the complexities of the college admission landscape.The discussion unfolds around the challenges and nuances of the college admissions process, particularly emphasizing the transformational journey students encounter while preparing their applications. The speakers reflect on the significance of authentic self-discovery in crafting college essays, noting that the admissions process is not merely a bureaucratic hurdle but a profound opportunity for personal growth. In sharing insights from their conversations, they highlight the misconception that academic grades and test scores are the sole determinants of admission success. Instead, they advocate for a holistic approach, which prioritizes the articulation of personal narratives and values unique to each applicant. The episode serves as a guide for both students and parents, encouraging a shift in perspective towards viewing college admissions as an exploration of identity rather than a mere checklist of achievements.Takeaways: The importance of being judicious in podcast selection to avoid political overload is paramount. Engaging in meditation and embracing quiet reflection can greatly enhance one's mental well-being. It is essential to recognize that one's narrative and personal experiences hold significant weight in college applications. Students should pursue their intellectual curiosity above all else to cultivate a compelling college application. The narrative conveyed in college essays must authentically reflect the student's values and experiences, rather than what they think admissions officers want to see. Creating a strong college application involves developing a unique story that highlights individual passions and contributions to the academic community. Links referenced in this episode:nextgenadmit.comnextgenadmit.com/masterclassDyllen Nellis on YouTubeConnect with Heather:Join the Just Breathe Community on PatreonGive a copy of Heather's new book, Parenting with Pride. Join Heather's *free* Substack weekly newsletter

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  47:30
• Beyond the Breath: Accountability Matters

  Accountability is the central theme of this discourse, as I delve into its profound significance in our personal and societal spheres. We explore the imperative of being accountable not only to ourselves but also to one another, a principle I have come to cherish deeply, particularly in the context of familial relationships. The discourse reflects on my journey toward understanding accountability, particularly how my interactions with significant individuals have shaped my perspective. I contend that the absence of accountability in contemporary discourse, especially among public figures, has led to a troubling erosion of trust and integrity within our institutions. As we navigate these complex dynamics, I invite you to reflect on the role of accountability in your own life and consider its potential to foster positive change within your community.The discourse delves into the profound importance of accountability in our interpersonal and societal relations. The speaker reflects on their personal journey with accountability, illustrating how it has evolved over the years, particularly influenced by familial dynamics and significant personal relationships. The narrative articulates the notion that accountability is not merely a personal trait but a societal necessity, especially in light of contemporary political issues. The speaker poignantly critiques the apparent absence of accountability in public figures, particularly highlighting a lack of consequences for actions that undermine democratic principles. This observation serves as a catalyst for a broader discussion on the implications of accountability in fostering trust and emotional maturity within communities and families. Furthermore, the speaker invites listeners to contemplate their own accountability practices, suggesting that personal reflection can precipitate collective change, thereby reinforcing the fabric of society itself.Takeaways: Accountability is essential in our personal interactions and helps foster trust between individuals. I share my personal journey of learning accountability, which was significantly influenced by my relationship with Steve. The absence of accountability in leadership can lead to a culture of disregard for ethical standards and truth. Teaching children about accountability is crucial for their emotional development and maturity, as well as for building familial bonds. In our society, it is imperative to challenge misinformation and hold individuals accountable for their actions. Practicing kindness can create a ripple effect, positively influencing our communities amidst challenging times. Connect with Heather:Join the Just Breathe Community on PatreonGive a copy of Heather's new book, Parenting with Pride. Join Heather's *free* Substack weekly newsletter Work with Heather one-on-one or bring her into your organization to speak or run a workshop!Please subscribe to, rate, and review Just Breathe. And, as always, please share

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  26:28
• Beyond the Breath: A Reflection on Modern Discourse

  This podcast episode delves into the pressing concerns surrounding nationalism and its implications for democracy in contemporary society. I reflect on two poignant speeches that resonate with the current political climate, emphasizing that the roots of division often stem from seeds of distrust and blame. I draw parallels between historical precedents and contemporary issues, highlighting the dangers of authoritarianism and the necessity for civic courage. The discourse urges listeners to contemplate their roles in fostering inclusivity and combating hate, particularly in light of governmental actions that undermine diversity, equity, and inclusion initiatives. Ultimately, I call upon each individual to assert their voice and take actionable steps, thereby contributing to a collective resistance against tyranny and fostering a more just society.The discourse presented in this episode of the podcast delves into the profound implications of societal narratives shaped by political discourse. The speaker embarks on an introspective journey, reflecting upon two poignant speeches that resonate with the current socio-political climate. One of the speeches, delivered by Governor J.B. Pritzker, draws critical parallels between historical authoritarian regimes and contemporary political strategies that seek to divide and ostracize marginalized communities. The speaker articulates a deep concern regarding the insidious nature of hatred and nationalism, positing that these elements serve as precursors to tyranny. This examination encourages listeners to engage deeply with the implications of blind allegiance to supremacy, advocating instead for a patriotism rooted in inclusion and diversity. The speaker underscores the necessity of courage and collective action in the face of rising authoritarianism, urging individuals to confront fear and silence with resolute opposition. Through this lens, the episode not only highlights the pressing need for vigilance against oppressive narratives but also calls for a unified front in defense of democratic values, thereby fostering a space for reflective contemplation and active engagement in societal discourse.Takeaways: The podcast explores the alarming parallels between historical authoritarianism and current political climates, emphasizing the necessity of vigilance. We must acknowledge that hate and discrimination can emerge insidiously, often beginning with seemingly innocuous grievances. The host urges listeners to actively participate in democracy by voicing concerns to representatives, fostering a culture of accountability. Nationalism is identified as a profound existential threat, distinct from patriotism, which should celebrate diversity rather than denigrate it. In times of political turmoil, individual actions of courage and solidarity become essential to resist the tide of oppression. The discussion calls for a collective understanding of diversity, equity, and inclusion, emphasizing their importance in countering systemic injustices. Links referenced in this episode:national LGBTQ task forcejust securityMentioned in this episode:PatreonLearn more about the Just Breathe Community on PatreonPatreon

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