140: Overwhelmed No More: Where to Start Homeschooling with Confidence
If you're wondering where to start homeschooling, the answer may surprise you—look in the mirror. In this episode, we talk about why your own education as a mom is the first and most important step in your homeschool journey. Education and leadership don’t begin with lesson plans—they begin with you.You'll hear why your kids will follow your lead more than your curriculum, and how a simple growth routine can shape your homeschool for the better. Whether you're a new homeschool mom or simply looking to refresh your perspective, this episode will help you take a powerful first step.Here’s what we cover:✅Why Charlotte Mason said, “There is no education but self-education”✅The simple 3-step plan Kerry used for personal growth ✅How to model a love of reading and lifelong learning for your kids ✅How reading, journaling, and sharing weekly simplifies your homeschool and gives YOU freedom to study what is important to your family ✅Why summer is the perfect time to start your growth habit👉 Grab the free resource mentioned in the podcast to kickstart your own growth routine and lead with confidence!From Overwhelmed Mom to Confident Mentor (use code: CONFIDENT10 to SAVE $10 & come free)4 Steps to Raising Christian Leaders in Your Homeschool (FREE Limited Time Replay)Show NotesHey everyone, welcome back to Homeschool Coffee Break, where we are pouring you a fresh cup of encouragement for moms who are raising the next generation of Christian leaders. I'm your host, Kerry Beck, and today we're diving into a powerful truth: education starts with you, Mom.Leadership starts with you, Mom. Yes, you—not your curriculum, not the perfect schedule—you. Your habits, your mindset, your faith.I want to unpack this through this episode as well. But before I do, I just would love to encourage you to click the subscribe button so that we can get this out to more and more people, and more and more moms like you can get the encouragement, simplify their life, and get rid of the overwhelm. Stop the overwhelm so you can take a coffee break.All right. Let's start with Charlotte Mason. She says, "There is no education but self-education." What does that mean? True education is not external—memorizing a bunch of facts, saying, "I finished this book or this curriculum." It is all about internal. Real education is taking ownership, having that desire. You can't really even make your kids be educated because it has to be something from within them. And that is the same with you.You know, kids don't become leaders, they don't become educated from tests. They grow in their education by watching and imitating real life. That's you. They grow in ownership and leadership skills by watching you and imitating real life.So you cannot force education, but you can lead by example. And that's what it's all about. You need to lead by example. You need to take ownership of your own education, and then your kids will see what's going on.My kids never doubted that I love to read. Now I will tell you, when they were little, maybe they did, because I'd fall asleep at night. I tried to read at night in bed, and, you know, I'd just fall asleep with the book on my chest. I was tired all the time. But as we got out of those little kid stages, I read. I still read voraciously. I read all the time.And I'm watching my—especially my girls right now, because they've got kids at home—they are reading. They're actually reading instead of turning on that TV. That is a mom. They are modeling and mentoring a love for reading.I am thankful that all four of my grandkids—we don't know about Sloane, Sloane's only four months old—but all of them, even my grandson that goes 90 to nothing—he is all out boy—"Gigi, will you read a book?" Or I walked in last week on Monday night, I was up there, and he was sitting in his dad's lap, listening just still as could be, listening to him read that book.There is something special building relationships, but also you are modeling and mentoring for your kids the importance of reading, the importance of learning. And that is really a basis for moving forward to be a good leader.Let me just say, when I say leadership, some people get confused, and they're like, "My kid's not going to be CEO or Mayor or whatever." No. Leadership is influence—nothing more, nothing less. And you are a leader to your family. You are influencing. Your kids more than likely will grow up and have a family, and they will need to be able to lead and influence well.You know, I do a class. And I did one recently—"4 Steps to Raising Christian Leaders"—and this is really Step 4. It is you, Mom. You go first.And this is being published right before summertime. I don't know when you're listening to it, but this is being published right before summertime. It is a great time to take a step back and really work on your own education, growing yourself.So let's talk about a very simple growth routine for you. This is something I was able to do even when my kids were at home, even when they were little. Okay? I had a morning growth plan, you could say. And what did I do?I would say there's sort of two seasons, or maybe three. We had a membership at a gym. When the kids were real little, I would go to aerobics class. That was sort of a different thing. And before that, I would be here at home and read my Bible, and pray, and read books. But then it got to the point where I needed—when we were homeschooling—I didn't have time for that. So I would go up there, work on the treadmill, and while I was on the treadmill, I could read books.I read John Taylor Gatto's book The Underground History of American Education. Oh, my goodness! Was I educated? I learned so much about where American education comes from. That's a whole different story. But I would multitask in that way.As the kids got older, I would go for walks because we didn’t have that gym membership. I would go for a walk and I would pray. I'd come home. I would read my Bible, and then I would read a book. And then I would keep my journal. I'd write down any thoughts I had about what I had just read. It's a very simple one.I wanted to exercise. I tried praying. I still to this day go for walks, and I pray while I'm on a walk. I read my Bible either before or after—it just sort of depends on the season. And then I read books at all different times now because the kids are gone. But when they were there, it had to be in the morning, because if I didn't do it then, it probably wasn't going to get done.Super simple, and it doesn’t necessarily take a lot of time. You know, it is better if you could just read two or three pages of a book a day regularly than trying to cram in two hours on a Saturday.So I am actually—I told you—I journal my thoughts. This is my reading journal. If you're watching on the video—this one, let's see—2007. We were reading Silas Marner. I think you can see it's nothing big. It's just a little bitty thing. And so I would just try to write a page or so. Sometimes it was paragraphs, sometimes it was just bullet points of things that I was thinking about after I had read. Whatever that book is—it’s nothing fancy, just reflections, notes, and sometimes just one or two sentences, just to get it out of my head and onto paper, because it will stick with me more then.So this is not about being academic. It is about growth and habit and modeling and mentoring for your kids. So start small and then be consistent.Again, summer is a great time—if you were listening to this when it first comes out—great time. Even year-round schoolers usually slow down a little bit in the summer as well.So it becomes self-education first. Start a growth plan, a simple growth plan just like I told you that I do. Model it before you teach it. You need to work on a growth plan before you ever go teaching this to your kids.Because this is what we did with our kids. I will tell you the 3-step plan: we would choose a classic book and read it every single day. Then write one page in my journal every single day, and then share it with one person during the week—or maybe you want to share it with your family.Now, we took this a little step further. Once I understood what I was doing, then I started to teach my kids, and then it became a habit. They would read every day. They would write once a day. And then once a week, we would have a discussion about whatever the book is.But I think this is just such a simple way to be able to educate yourself about anything. It could be a novel—like I love Jane Eyre. I like romance novels. I'm reading a mystery right now. But it could be nonfiction too. There's a book that I was sharing with our boot camp yesterday—it was How to Forgive When You Don’t Really Feel Like It. There’s another called The Well-Watered Garden. It was so impactful on me that seriously, when I was finished, I should have done it throughout the time, but I just went through—I went back to the book and wrote down notes in my journal, so I would remember what it was all about.So, you want to practice this yourself before you teach your kids. This is a great way to develop critical thinking skills and decision-making skills with your children. But you need to understand the process.Normally, I would encourage you—read one book, a classic. It can be a kid's classic. In fact, a few years ago, some moms and I read Anne of Green Gables. And it gave me a whole different perspective. She was so—what was the guy's name? I can’t remember—the guy that was giving her a hard time. But she was so angry at him, and forgiveness was a real theme towards the end of the book. And I didn’t even catch that when I read it like 10 years ago because I had walked through forgiveness in a way—I’d walked through being rejected.And so every time you read a classic, it’s going to speak to you over and over again. It was great. And we kept a journal—I don’t even know where my journal is from that one—but I kept a journal, and so did the other moms that agreed to read Anne of Green Gables.So read a classic—even a kid’s classic. Read it and write in your journal every day, and then once a week, share something about that book with someone. I would encourage you to share it at the dinner table and just let your kids know what you're reading.Pick another book. It could still be a kid's classic. But by book number three, it needs to be an adult classic. I remember when we ordered The Iliad, and the kids were reading—it was a girl’s ancient—we were studying ancient history. And I mean, that thing—I wish I had it—it’s like that thick. It was really big.And I was like, “Oh my goodness, are you really going to read that?” I thought, “Well, if I’m asking my girls, who are teenagers, to read it, I think I should be able to read it and understand.” It was a great book. And it wasn’t near as hard as what I thought it was going to be.So pick an adult classic. The other reason you want to get to an adult—and I would do two or three adult classics—is when you read on your reading level, you experience some of the difficulty sometimes our children have or the frustration. When you read a kid’s classic, you're like, “Oh, this is easy, I understand it.” But you get to an adult reading level, and sometimes you really wrestle with some of the themes and the concepts and what the author is trying to say.It helps you understand what your child is going through in 7th grade when he's reading something on the 7th grade level, and you're like, “That’s so easy.” No, it really isn’t. And it gives you more empathy for them as well. It also will grow your mind and your perspective on life in general.So let's just talk about this self-education. There is no true education except self-education. You need to come up with a personal growth plan that works in your schedule and then use our Read-Write-Discuss method and work through that. Do it first, and then teach your kids next fall.That way, you can use this with any subject area, with any book that is important to your family—or maybe your kids are interested in. If you're doing it with your kids next fall, I recommend starting with your read-aloud because everyone’s listening to the same book.So your mindset, your faith, your habits—they shape how your kids view education, how your kids view learning, how your kids view leadership.You have the power to lead your children by showing them how to grow educationally. Basically, just remember:Leadership starts with you, Mom—not because you're perfect, but because you're present and growing.Now, I do have two things I want to invite you to next week. Well, when you're listening to this, it'll just be in a couple of days. I am having an open house, and it costs $10. But guess what? I've got a coupon code, and you can save $10 and come for free.The class is a one-time class: From Overwhelmed Mom to Confident Mentor. It goes right along with some of these ideas of how do we educate ourselves—from overwhelmed mom to confident mentor? We’re going to talk a lot about leadership, education, and how that will give you confidence. It will simplify your homeschool. It will set you and your kids free from the school system, expectations, from your own expectations—set you free from comparing to everyone else.So all you need to do is use coupon code CONFIDENT10, and it will reduce your cost to zero. If you don't have the code, then it's $10 to come.The other thing is I still have a replay up. It will only be available for a few more days: 4 Steps to Raising Christian Leaders in Your Homeschool. And I will put a link in the show notes for that, so that you can go and watch that replay because it is only available this week. I know I don't normally put timely things on my podcast, but that's what we're doing.Hey, thanks for spending time with me. I am Kerry Beck with Homeschool Coffee Break. We'll talk to you next time.Show Notes:Hey, everyone, Kerry, Beck here with homeschool coffee break where we help you stop the overwhelm so you can actually take a coffee break. No coffee with me. I'm actually recording this in the afternoon. Haven't had coffee for a few hours, but I want to help you take a break, slow down and pause. And today's episode is so good and so helpful to you, I can, I promise you, if you put these things into practice, it will change the way you think, the way your mind works, and even help with your kids as well. We are talking about moving from complaining to being thankful, building a gratitude habit in your homeschool, in your family, in your home as well.Why does this episode matter so much? Let me just tell you. Actually, I think I wrote this down today. You'll be getting this in a few weeks. But I wrote this down today. I was sort of pondering what to do. But I've been keeping a gratitude journal since 2010. That's almost 15 years, and the first 2 or 3 years I wrote down 3 things but I discipline religiously every single day, and every year I did that I added a thousand things. Then I became a little less structured, but I still kept a gratitude journal throughout the year. I may not have done it every year, and sometimes, like here, you can see I sort of color coded. There you go. That's more than 3 things here. That's more than 3 things. So it just depended on the day there's 3 right there. But today, on May 27th 2025, I entered number 10,000. Can you see that? 10,000 right there?And I'll just, I was a little skeptical last week. I was like, I don't want to write anything down. I want 10,000 to be something really great. But then this one I was like, just write what you're thinking about Kerry. So 9,999 were friends that had been praying for me, especially a few weeks ago, when my son got married, and there's just a little tension and everything. But I knew everything would be great, and we would have great joy because they were supporting me in prayer, but 10,000 number 10,000 I didn't really think about this morning, and I just wrote down my kids, faith in God and their protection of me. My kids have just been so supportive of me over the last several years, and that makes me feel good. I'm not. I wasn't trying to make that number 10,000. But that's just really what came to mind.So that is what we're talking about. We're talking about gratitude and the power of gratitude in good times and in bad times, before we dive into that. If you have not subscribed to our channel, then I would strongly recommend that you do that. It will help us get this message out to more and more people, and don't more of us want our kids to go from complaining to gratitude. Don't we want to have victory through the gratitude? Don't we want to have joy through gratitude? I'm going to talk all about that today. So share this, find one person, you could click that, share button and share it with someone today.So the power of gratitude and hard seasons. Now, I don't know if you know me very well, but I will tell you. For the past 9 years it's been a struggle for me. I've been lonely at times. I have felt rejection. I've had lots of financial struggle in and out. I've had lots of grief, both death, rejection, abandonment, and betrayal, and it's hard. About 5 years ago, I want to say, 5 or 6 years ago I had one of the hardest thanksgivings. Thanksgiving seemed to have been really hard in the last 9 years, but God showed up. I had an explosion at the dinner table in my own parents. It was pretty embarrassing, and my own parents house, and about 2 or 3 days later I had to say, Okay, God, I need to apologize, and I went from negativity to joy and peace in my life, and some of that was thankfulness to God that he is working in me, and he is helping me get past all these hardships.I will tell you that faith is not about the absence of hardship. It's about how we trust God in the middle of all of it, and one of the ways we can show our trust is through gratitude. Being thankful is not natural, being selfish and wanting our own way, and getting everyone to pay attention to us and do what we want. It's easy being thankful and pulling back and being humble. That is a discipline. In 1st Thessalonians 5, 18. It says in everything. Give thanks. And I believe that is what can truly change the way. Actually, I don't just think there are scientific. There are scientific evidence that when we start to give thanks on a regular basis. We have better sleep. We have better relationships. Our kids, when they do it, become more generous. There are scientific studies that show this. They have done so much seriously. When we show gratitude, it changes the synapses, the wires, all those things up here, and if we give gratitude at least 30 days and more. It can truly change the way you think, and it can change the way your kids think.So let's talk about 3 tips to help you with this. First, we need to thank God first, and as we thank God we should be modeling for our own children. God is always good. God is always in control. God is always working things for good. It may not look good like I'm going to tell you right now. They're like. Seriously, God, this does not look good in my life right now, and I'll just let you in on a little tip in case you haven't ever heard my husband left 9 years ago, and I've had to do a lot of soul searching. I've had to do a lot of work on myself, not me working, but allowing the Holy Spirit to come and work in my life, and his gratitude has me so far from that negative blame shift all those things to seeing that God is good, that God is love, that God is working. God is working in me. Praise God, thank you. But even more important. He's working at Steve, and I believe with all that she's bringing it back, and I'm praying for him. God is always good, even when it doesn't look like it, even when he doesn't look like he is working.If nothing else goes right. I always know Hebrews 13, 5. God! He says, I will never leave you nor forsake you or abandon you. And he says in Philippians 1, 6, I am working in you until the day of Christ Jesus. I know that it's true for me. I know that it's true for my kids, just like I could be thankful. Number 10,000 for my kids walking with God, and I am trusting, and I still believe that he is working good in Steve's life. So how can I believe this now? Because I'm going to tell you 9 years ago that was probably not true.Oh, I forgot my! I will give you 3 tips that will help change your brain seriously. Family gratitude journal during every morning, at breakfast or every night when you are eating dinner, or before you go to bed, open your gratitude, journal, and go around the table, go around the circle and say, Give me one thing you're thankful for today and write it down. You might color code it for different kids, so that you know who said what? Because then, when they start complaining, you can pull that gratitude journal out and say. Hey, let's take a let's just take a step back, and then read the things that they said they were thankful for.But every day, once a day have everyone say something they're thankful for I wish that I'd had my children keep individual gratitude journals as they got older. If you have older kids, I would give them 5 or 10 min every day. Just make everyone stop, and we're going to all be grateful. Let them write it down, and then let them share it out loud as well, let your kids hear you. Thank God aloud, and if you don't think you can say thank you, I'm going to tell you what, if you are living in a house, you should be able to say, Thank you. If you have food today, you should be able to say, Thank you. There are so many things. We may think we're not making enough money, or we don't have the greatest thing because we're comparing ourselves to social media whole nother subject. But I am telling you. You need to be able to. There is always something to be thankful, a good night's sleep. It does not have to be material as well. There are so many things to be thankful for.I will tell you that we have. I was looking for it. This resource is called oh, gosh! Can't really see it. Give thanks. A mother's prayer journal, and yeah, I don't know how many days are in it, but it does allow you to be able to give thanks and any any resources I mentioned. Just look in the show notes, and you can get those as well.So tip number one. Thank God! First model this for your kids. Tip number 2. Choose gratitude over complaining. Gratitude is a choice. It is not a feeling. There was a man named Martin Rinker. Back in the Middle Ages there was a huge war. This is in the Black Plague, the bubonic plague. This man was a pastor, and during one year he was doing 50 funerals a day. 50 funerals a day, including one of them, ended up being his wife. I don't have the prayer with me right now, but he has written a beautiful prayer. I will link it to you in the show notes that kept saying, Now, thank we all are God. And he kept saying, Thank we all are God. How can you say thank you to God when you're performing 50 funerals a day? If that man can say thank you to God. In the midst of 50 deaths a day, and funerals, I should be able to say, Thank you for the many blessings that I have. You need to help your kids learn this, that we choose joy and gratitude, no matter, the circumstances.I was actually listening to a podcast this morning. I don't know if you've ever read the book, the hiding place, but in the podcast they were referring to a section in the story. And this was Betsy. I cannot remember the person that wrote the book. Okay, is Betsy's sister, and you'll probably know who he is. She is. But they were in a concentration camp. They were Jews, they were not Jews, but they had hidden Jews. So now the 2 sisters are in a concentration camp together, and I want to say it was like 1,400 people in a place that 400 people should be, and they actually somehow had a Bible.And they read, and we know no, in everything give thanks, for this is the will of God, and we know that all things work together for good to those who are called according to his purpose. And so they decided that they were going to tell each other things that they were thankful for, and they were thankful for this Bible because it was hidden on her neck, and the guards did not see him, and they had to like strip naked to get into this concentration camp, and the guards were blinded to that, and they were thanking for things. And then, Betsy, the very calm person, says, Well, we need to thank them for the fleas and her sister like. I wish I could remember who's the author of the hiding place? She says. Fleas! No way. We are going to thank them. They were in a place right then that there was a Flea infestation, and so she kept saying, it doesn't say, only be thankful in the good times it is in all circumstances. So they said, Thank you.And then they continued to have morning worship, morning whatever they called it, and were able to share the Bible with those around them, and then they decided to do 2 a day, and they wondered why the guards were not coming to see them. They weren't bothering them, and they could share Jesus. They could share the Bible with all these people. Well, guess what? Because the guards didn't want to have anything to do with fleece. Is that a reason to thank God? Yes, because they were able to share Jesus and his salvation with all these people in the concentration camp, and who knows what impact that may have had on them?So we need to choose joy and gratitude, no matter what our circumstances are. Some practical tips would be a gratitude over grumbling jar anytime. Someone complains. They write down one thing that they are thankful for. If you hear a child complain? You've got a little stack of papers, or post-its, or whatever, and you just stop. Write it down and then put it in the jar, and then you have a history of the things that they are thankful for, and you can read those aloud. Maybe sometimes when they complain, we pull that jar out and we read them. Do this with your kids. You're not going to do it to them. You want to do it with them.Another thing that you could do is to actually do some. Give thanks. Copy work. I have a let me see if I can find it there. It is this is called, give thanks to God again. You can't see it too well. Give thanks to God. Copy, work for all ages, different verses that your kids can copy, and y'all can talk about just copying that down, and they'll be thinking about it as they copy it down as well.Tip number one. Thank God! First, model it for your kids. Tip number 2. Choose gratitude over complaining. Tip number 3. Create a gratitude, practice habits start small and they grow deep roots. Just think about me. I hit 10,000 not really trying, and know lately it's not been every single day, but I have that practice of being thankful. I was telling my son this morning. You know I can be going down our main highway, and I hit all green lights and all this I'm like, oh, thank you God! He gave me a blessing. I can be walking, and I hear the birds. Oh, thank you! God for the birds you start to notice so many more things that you can be thankful for.So start your family or your homeschool day with gratitude. I've already mentioned the family gratitude challenge. If you want to do that another way, we have our 30 day gratitude challenge you can. When you get it, you can get it like this, which is a blank. 30 day calendar. And every day your kids write something down younger kids. You might want this. There is one idea on every single day, and there's space for them to write it down. A family member food. You enjoy something in nature, and that gives them a little prompt as to what they can write it down, and then the last thing would be, thank you. Cards or a Thank you letter, and in that, and there'll be links to all of this in the show notes. So you can just go get those is how to write a thank you letter or thank you. Card. There's a few questions that you answer, and then you actually write it. And I would say each week, encourage your kids to write a thank you letter to a neighbor, to a grandparent, to a pastor, to a friend, to a neighbor, or say, neighbor, any of these? And then, lastly, this is fun. It's a practical hands-on. These are our gratitude activities for kids, and you can be able to get that. I think that's in our gratitude. Give thanks, toolkit as well.As we close. I just want to say, moms, I know you're tired. Homeschooling is stressful. Homeschooling, especially comparison is real, and we need to get rid of it. Gratitude is the way we fight comparison. Gratitude is the way we fight. Overwhelm gratitude is the way we fight. Worry those things sort of fall by the wayside when we can get our eyes in the right place. Psalm 16 11, says, in the presence of the Lord is joy, and then it says in Nehemiah, and the joy of the Lord is our strength, and the presence of the Lord is joy. Get up, and every day spend time in him, and that can give you joy that day, and then that joy, the joy of the Lord will give you strength to the rest of the day. If you are tired, that is a great way to start it. Presence of the Lord is joy, and the joy of the Lord is our strength.Gratitude transforms not just our attitudes, but our kids, hearts, too. You can start today, and it does not have to be perfect. So here's my challenge. Say one thing you're thankful for today, and then do it again tomorrow, and then do it again the next day and the next, and build habit of gratitude. Help your kids do the same. Colossians 3, 17. Whatever you do, give thanks to God the Father through Him in everything. Give thanks.What do you need to do pause. Breathe, breathe, can do lots alright, and reset the button, reset your life by being grateful. Now I will tell you we have resources for you. I've mentioned. Most of them are 30 day gratitude challenge our things to be thankful for. List. Our gratitude. Oh, I didn't mention this one gratitude journal for kids. It's a printable, and your kids can fill things out for that as well. And then we have our gift. Thanks, toolkit, which includes, give thanks to God, copy work for all ages. Give thanks to mother's prayer journal, gratitude activities for kids and a 30 Day gratitude journal. You've got a lot in there. So pick the one that would help you the most.And I just look forward to hearing how your family, how your homeschool, and how your life changes by just starting to be grateful and finding one thing a day, just one thing a day to start it with, to be thankful. I know it can change your life. It has changed my life. I'm Kerry Beck, with homeschool coffee bright. We'll talk to you next time.
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