Coming Up for Air

It's my birthday episode! I'm turning 34, and after four years of being single, I've got quite a lot to say about life, love, independence and getting older.
This week I am having a proper chat about everything I've learnt from spending my early 30s single, and why my life turning out differently from what I expected has taught me so much.
From learning to genuinely enjoy my own company and becoming more independent, to navigating dating, friendships, loneliness, comparison and the pressure to have everything figured out by a certain age.
We're talking about why your 30s don't have to follow anybody else's timeline, why wanting a relationship and loving your single life can coexist, and why getting older can actually be something to look forward to.
A positive, honest birthday episode about growing into yourself, enjoying the life you're building and realising that happiness doesn't have to look the way you originally imagined.
Here's to 34 and everything still to come! ❤️
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Do you ever feel like you'd quite like to meet someone, but the thought of actually dating makes you want to stay single indefinitely?
You want the relationship, but you don't particularly want the awkward first dates, the endless conversations, the uncertainty or the effort of getting to know somebody who might not go anywhere.
In this episode, I am getting into why dating can feel so unappealing when you genuinely want to meet someone. Have you become too quick to dismiss people? Are you expecting an instant connection with somebody you've known for two hours? And are you really leaving things to fate, or have you made it practically impossible for anyone to come into your life?
I will also talk about the uncomfortable difference between being open to a relationship and actually being willing to meet people, why dating can start to feel like a second job, and how to approach it differently without forcing yourself onto the apps or settling for someone you don't particularly like.
Because maybe the question isn't whether you want a relationship. Maybe it's whether you're willing to go through the process of finding one.
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Join Us on Patreon - ⁠patreon.com/ComingUpForAir⁠ 
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No Contact Guide - https://v2.stan.store/Loula/p/30-day-no-contact-guide 
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I spent so much time trying to understand why my relationship ended that I barely stopped to think about what it was doing to me.
In this episode, I am talking about the obsession with finding answers after a breakup. Replaying conversations, questioning memories, analysing your ex's behaviour and convincing yourself that if you could just understand why they left, you'd finally be able to move on.
But what happens when every answer leads to another question? And what if understanding your breakup isn't actually the thing that's going to help you recover?
An honest conversation about heartbreak, self-blame, closure and learning to live with questions you might never get answers to.
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Join Us on Patreon - ⁠patreon.com/ComingUpForAir⁠ 
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There are things I did during my breakup that I would be absolutely mortified to admit now. So naturally, I've decided to discuss them on a podcast. 
After my 14-year relationship ended, I entered an era of questionable decisions, complete delusion and behaviour that I genuinely thought was perfectly reasonable at the time.
In this episode, I'm confessing some of my most embarrassing breakup moments, from the things I convinced myself of to the things my poor friends had to endure, alongside five truly unhinged breakup confessions from other people.
A slightly different episode of Coming Up For Air, because sometimes healing means being able to look back and think... darling, what on EARTH were you doing? ❤️ 

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Join Us on Patreon - ⁠patreon.com/ComingUpForAir⁠ 
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Sometimes the hardest part of a breakup isn't just what happened between the two of you. It's dealing with everybody else's version of what happened afterwards.
The unwanted updates about your ex. Friends telling you what you should do. People comparing how you're both getting on. The gossip, the opinions and that horrible feeling that because you were the one who openly struggled, everybody assumes you're the one who's doing worse.
I know this feeling particularly well.
I was incredibly open about how much the end of my fourteen-year relationship broke me, and in this episode, I want to talk about something I've learnt since: being honest about your heartbreak doesn't mean you owe everybody an explanation of how you're recovering from it.
I talk about how to handle hearing things about your ex without reacting, why other people's advice isn't always right for you, how to stop participating in comparisons you never agreed to, and why you don't need to prove you're happy just because people witnessed you being devastated.
A conversation about protecting your own experience of a breakup from becoming everybody else's business.
Want More Like This - https://stan.store/Loula 
My Instagram - @move.with.lou
Join Us on Patreon - ⁠patreon.com/ComingUpForAir⁠ 
YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@loula.comingupforair 
No Contact Guide - https://v2.stan.store/Loula/p/30-day-no-contact-guide
Support the show