Recovery Elevator

Today we have Will. He is 32 years old, lives in Allenstown, NH and took his last drink on October 5th, 2019.
 
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Café RE – THE social app for sober people
Bozeman 2026 – August 12th-16th, 2026
 
[06:22] Paul introduces Will:
 
Will is 32 years old, lives in New Hampshire and works for the US Postal Service. Will enjoys writing, watching films, hiking and traveling. 
 
Will grew up in a strict, religious household. From middle school through high school, Will did homeschooling which left him feeling like he didn't really have any friends. By the time he was 15 or 16, he felt like he was missing out on a lot of life experiences. Will moved out of home with his brother when he turned 18 and says this is when his partying began as a way to make up for lost time.
 
Will began working in the food service industry and says it was his first taste of life outside of the religious bubble he had grown up in. While he had a level of social anxiety that kept him out of nightclubs and things of that nature, his brother enjoyed the nightlife and typically had alcohol in the house which Will would drink by himself.
 
Between the ages of 19 and 21, Will had found some friends he calls kindred spirits in that they were all creative and a little nerdy. He says his life was simple back then: go to work and then go hang out with his friends and play/watch video games while drinking.
 
At 22, Will got a DUI. This was not enough to make him feel like he needed to stop drinking but he thought he should try moderating. The financial struggles after the DUI were hard on Will and he was beginning to feel like he screwed his life up already. Between ages 22 and 24, Will references them as his rock bottom years. He was losing friends due to his behavior when he drank and felt haunted by social failures and missing opportunities.
 
Will tried going to therapy at 24 but didn't address his drinking at all. The anxiety and depression were crippling, and he began having suicidal ideations. Will tried going to AA but struggled not to focus on the things he didn't agree with. It was a TV series called Patrick Melrose that helped inspire Will to try something new. Will decided to try going to rehab.
 
Will started burning the ships with his family and the supervisory staff at his jobs so that he could plan to go to detox. He was there for nine days and says it was an amazing experience. He felt good about the decision to go and says he got a lot of out of it.
 
The cycle of starts and stops began, Will was trying to hide his drinking unsuccessfully. In this middle of this time, he had started dating someone and fell in love. They ended up moving in together. Will says the move was helpful for him, but he was still trying to drink and hide it from her. 
 
The night before a planned trip to NYC, Will drank a couple of beers, and his girlfriend could smell it on him the next morning. They talked about it on the way to their Airbnb and Will spent his first day sober walking around the city. This experience left an impression on Will, and he recognized he could have fun sober and it made him crave more life experiences.
 
Will's girlfriend was very supportive; he returned to AA meetings and got a new therapist that specialized in addiction. After several months, he began taking classes for recovery support. An internship led to a job and Will says it was life changing.
 
Since being in recovery, Will says that his depression is gone and he is better at holding himself accountable in his life. A lot has happened since he quit drinking, but he feels that all of the challenges have made him stronger.
 
Recovery Elevator
We took the elevator down.
You've got to take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
 
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Today's episode includes a Q & A session conducted live at Recovery Point, which is a resource center for those who struggle with addiction located in Bozeman, Montana.
 
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Café RE – THE social app for sober people
Bozeman 2026 – August 12th-16th, 2026
 
[02:19] Paul introduces Jay, Jennifer, Chris and Linda
 
Each panel member shares a little about themselves and what drove them to seek recovery.
 
Question – When did you open up to community?
 
Jay shares that he started going to AA while in jail and attended a program called Bridging the Gap through treatment court which helped him find connection and community.
 
Jen was a few months into her recovery when she discovered Café RE and found that others sharing their stories helped her a lot.
 
Chris said he had made several half-hearted attempts at quitting before finding books and communities. He shares that he was stubborn at first, but now has made many friends in Café RE.
 
Linda attended treatment court with Jay but was trying to be a lone wolf. She didn't have a driver's license and found herself having to ask others for help. She found community in AA and NA/
 
Questions – What's your favorite recovery quote? One word to summarize your sobriety?
 
Linda – "it's only a thing if you make it a thing" and her word is "unbelievable"
 
Chris – "play the tape forward" and his word is "peaceful"
 
Jen – "keep it simple" and her word is "content"
 
Jay – "this too shall pass – the good and the bad" and his word is "serenity"
 
The panel shares their observations on the stigma around addiction decreasing and the increase of alcohol-free options when they go out. They all agree it is great to see that there are more options for people that don't want to drink and more and more places for opportunities to have mocktails while socializing and living life.
Question – In a life without alcohol, has something surprised you?
 
Jen shares that she always loved to camp and the first time she went alcohol-free, she felt uncomfortable at first. She sees that she has more time to do the things she loves and try new things.
 
Chris says he has so much clarity and energy to do things. Having more time, flexibility and extra money has been nice.
 
Jay says a lot of his hobbies stayed the same, he just enjoys them more now. He realized he doesn't really like fishing after doing it for so many years. He has also found that he enjoys coaching his daughter's softball team. 
 
Question – What advice do you have for the person that may be struggling to quit drinking?
 
Jay – you don't have to do it alone, you don't have to be ashamed
 
Jen – you can do it, and reach out
 
Chris – you don't have to do it alone, reach out and engage in a community
 
Linda – find one person that you can trust and start there.
 
[49:39] Thoughts from Paul:
 
The planet is currently giving out signs of distress, and all have anchoring to humans and what we have done to nature. Addiction may be the answer to this. When we stop poisoning ourselves with alcohol, a connection or reconnection with nature takes place.
 
Addiction, or the other side of addiction, is what connects our species back to the pulsations of the earth, animals, wind, sea and within our own hearts. Addiction and the healing that follows is what connects us back to ourselves, the planets, and the animals.
 
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down.
You've got to take the stairs back up.
We can do this.
 
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Café RE

Today we have Brittany. She is 44 years old, lives in New Braunfels, TX and she had her last drink on May 27th, 2025.
 
This episode is brought to you by:
 
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Bozeman 2026 – August 12th-16th, 2026
 
[02:07] Paul introduces Brittany:
 
Brittany is 44 years old, is originally from Wisconsin, and lives in New Braunfels, TX with her husband of 18 years. Together they have four kids. For fun, Brittany enjoys sporting events and traveling with her family.
 
Brittany shares she had a great childhood. Her parents were very supportive of her and her older brother. Her father was the child of alcoholics, so he chose not to drink so there was limited exposure to it while Brittany was growing up.
 
Brittany's first drink was when she was 15 years old. She didn't drink much throughout her teens as she was more into sports that didn't leave much room for it. In Wisconsin, attending sporting events always included drinking. In college, Brittany enjoyed the party and playing drinking games and all of her friends drank like she did, so she didn't see it as a problem.
 
After college, Brittany met her husband. He went into the Air Force which found them moving to San Antonio. They hung out with a lot of other young married couples, and they all partied a lot on the weekends. Her husband didn't like Brittany's drinking so she would begin hiding how much she drank, seeing it as him trying to control her.
 
When their second daughter was born in 2014 with a rare genetic disorder, Brittany began to use alcohol as medication. Caring for a special needs child and also moving a lot as a military family was very stressful for Brittany. With her husband being deployed or on assignments, she was doing a lot of parenting alone which led her to self-medicate often.
 
When COVID happened, Brittany's husband was able to be home more, but that led to her drinking increase. Brittany switched from wine to vodka, assuming it would be less noticeable to her husband. She began to hide her drinking more and started promising to drink less but it never happened.
 
Memorial Day weekend of 2025 Brittany's husband left town for work, and she was getting the family settled into their new home with her parents. Brittany had vodka stashed and was drinking in secret throughout the day. That evening, she passed out at the dinner table. Since she had been lying to everyone about drinking, they were worried that something else might be wrong and her mother took her to the hospital.
 
While she was there, both the nurse and the doctor could see what the issue was, but Brittany was still in denial. Brittany will never forget when the doctor told her, "You are not alone". At this point, the family knew and it felt like a weight was lifted.
 
A family friend became a lifeline for Brittany, and she contacted him the next day. He is also in recovery and helped her feel less alone. She went to her first AA meeting that day. With the help of her parents since they were living in Wisconsin, Brittany was able to attend meetings, sometimes two, daily.
 
Brittany says things changed for her very quickly. She started feeling better physically, was losing weight and began working out. The light was beginning to come back into her eyes. Parenting was hard, but she enjoys it much more now that she isn't drinking.
 
Brittany's parting piece of guidance: You are not alone. Find a sober community and jump in with both feet.
 
Recovery Elevator
It all starts from the inside out.
I love you guys.
 
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Today we are asking for your help from the drunkest county in America to keep this project going.
Did you all know that the Recovery Elevator podcast is recorded and broadcasted to the world from the drunkest county in America? That would be Gallatin County, where I am sitting right now.
https://www.givebiggv.org/organizations/cafe-re-inc 
That's right. According to a recent CDC study, 26.8% of people who live in Gallatin County drink excessively, making it the drunkest county in the U.S.
When I first started the Recovery Elevator podcast in 2015, almost all of the top five drunkest counties in America were in Wisconsin. So step aside, Wisconsinites, because we've got the crown now. And it's more like a crown of thorns.
I find it ironic — eerily coincidental — that one of the top sobriety podcasts that focuses on alcohol is broadcast to you from the drunkest county. And did you know there are 3,244 counties in America?
If you're tuning in from the drunkest county in America, or really anywhere in the world, we've got your back, and you're not alone.
I'm going to switch gears slightly.
Recovery Elevator has a nonprofit called Café RE, and do you know how many times I've asked for donations on this podcast? That would be zero. Well, maybe the second or third time, but I rarely ask. In the drunkest county in America, there's an incredible event taking place today called Give Big, which is geared towards raising money for all the nonprofits in this county. We need your help to balance the scales in the drunkest county in America, and all your donations are fee-free if you donate today.
There's a link in the show notes to make a donation — thank you, Robyn. You can also Google "Gallatin Valley Give Big" and search for Café RE.
https://www.givebiggv.org/organizations/cafe-re-inc
And if you're in the Bozeman area, Recovery Elevator is doing a live podcast recording today at 1 pm at 2000 N. 7th Street in Bozeman, at a place called Recovery Point. We've got a panel lined up, and that episode comes out Monday, May 11th. There's also going to be an open mic, a hot dog cart, and more. Come on out — we'd love to meet you.
One more thing before we depart. Life is complicated, but it's also not at all. What are we doing here at Recovery Elevator? I heard a Toltec shaman once say there is nothing to learn, except how to unlearn. We are coming back together to find our people. To find our tribe.
A Lakota chief once said the answer to all our problems can be found by looking towards nature. When bison — American buffalo — sense a blizzard coming, they don't run to the hills. They come together, shoulder to shoulder, and walk through the storm.
We are doing the same thing. A drinking problem wants you alone, in a dark room, with liquid poison sloshing in a bottle. But as you already know, that's a one-way street to nowhere good. At first you tried to figure it out alone — that didn't work — and now you're returning to the pack, to the community, to the village. You're unlearning the idea that we have to be self-sufficient and have everything figured out on our own.
So life is complicated, but again, it's not. You can't do life — or an alcohol-free life — alone. Can't be done, shouldn't be done, and it's no fun.
Keep showing up, keep tuning in, keep listening, and share this podcast with a friend you think is struggling.
Here I am, alone in my basement in the drunkest county in America, talking into a microphone — and somehow, you're on the other side of it. That's the miracle of the present day. Community doesn't always look like a meeting room or a church basement anymore. It looks like earbuds on a morning commute, a podcast player at 2 am when you can't sleep, a stranger's voice telling you it can be done. That's what we're building here. But we can't keep building it without you. If this podcast or Café RE has ever meant anything to you, today is the day to give back. The link is in the show notes — donate to Café RE through Give Big Gallatin Valley, fee-free, today only. Help us keep the lights on in the drunkest county in America, so nobody out there has to stay in the dark alone.
 
https://www.givebiggv.org/organizations/cafe-re-inc

Today we have Chris. He is 55 years old, from Madison, WI, and he took his last drink of alcohol on April 7th, 2015.
 
This episode is brought to you by:
 
Sign up and get 10% off: Better Help
Café RE – THE social app for sober people
Bozeman 2026 – August 12th-16th, 2026
 
[02:02] Thoughts from Paul:
 
Paul recently gave an opening talk at a fundraising gala for Yellowstone Alliance Adventures. This is the venue where the annual Bozeman retreat is held. He shared with the guests that he holds an annual sober retreat there but initially hadn't rehearsed sharing that he was also sober. After a few moments of silence, mid-talk, Paul shared that he is also in recovery.
 
Paul says he knows he didn't have to share that part, but when he did, it felt good to be up there in front of a crowd as his authentic self. In a world that can very fake and shallow, people are craving authenticity. Paul wants to go places where he can be himself.
 
Listeners, where can you show up as yourself in your life? What curtains, walls, or barriers are you hiding behind where you think people don't want to see you? While it isn't easy to show up as your authentic self, you will be rewarded by doing so.
 
We are here; we are whole.
 
[07:03] Paul introduces Chris:
 
Chris is 55 years old, works in IT by day, has three kids across two marriages and for fun he likes to make music, create games, and enjoys working on art.
 
Chris' parents divorced when he was young due to his father's drinking. Because there was so much going on at home, Chris says he focused much of his attention on school, sports, drama and choir to remain out of the house. He shares that he only drank one time in high school and got caught and ended up with some consequences.
 
Once in college, Chris had the freedom to drinking and other drugs pretty heavily right away. Early on, he got kicked out of a bar. During is freshman year, depression kicked in and he had a suicide attempt. Chris says drinking was never good for him. He never felt like it was solving any problems, but he was entranced by it.
 
Chris never really saw his drinking as a problem and surrounded himself by people that drank like he did. He enjoyed playing in bands and going to bars. Over the next 15 years he began to get away from the drugs but found his alcohol use increasing to compensate. By his mid-30's, Chris says it was just him in his basement pretending to record music or write a book, but the reality was it was just him down there drinking.
 
At this point in time, Chris knew he had to try and control his drinking but was unable to do so. His second marriage was to someone who drank more than he did, which he assumed meant she wouldn't hassle him about what he was doing.  
 
Chris says there wasn't a definitive moment that led him to quit, it was more a gradual decent. He lost his job because he wasn't very present, he got a DUI and then got a divorce, all within six months' time. He had court ordered sobriety and white knuckled it for a while but ultimately planned his relapse which led to him drinking all hours of the day and realizing alcohol wasn't working anymore.
 
Chris reflects that this realization was a good thing. He tried a lot of different things in the beginning: AA, SMART recovery, podcasts, Quitlit – anything to fill the void he initially felt by not drinking. He was always willing to try different things and acknowledges that some things come and go. He joined Café RE for a songwriting course as he was approaching 10 years sober. Chris knows that staying strong in his recovery daily is what will keep him from relapsing.
 
Chris is grateful for his sobriety as he has navigated some difficult things over the last several years. He is glad he no longer uses alcohol as a crutch to make it through life. When times are tough, he leans more into more meetings or talking to friends.
 
Recovery Elevator
You took the elevator down
You got to take the stairs back up
We can do this
I love you guys
 
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Sobriety Tracker iTunes 
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