Abject Suffering

Dream TV is a game so obscure that even we have never heard of it, with a premise that was stale when they made it. Two kids are sucked into the TV! Ah! And the platforming is very, very bad. It’s overall uninspiring, so we talk about some horrifying social interactions that make us seriously consider our relationship to being trivia monsters, or “The Person Who Corrects People and Takes Away All of the Fun.”

Who would have guessed that this comedy podcast episode nominally about a Shrek party game would have turned into a sober rumination on body image issues?
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You might be surprised to learn that we don’t hate Sonic R. It controls awkwardly and was clearly rushed out the door, but the idea of a Sonic racing game isn’t inherently bad. They even made some fun explorable courses to go along with it. But you don’t know about that, you just know about the bizarre soundtrack.

Ubisoft looked at Nintendogs and decided “hey, we could mess that up.” The result was the Petz series, where you adopt an animal and train it to fight for you, but not in a Pokémon way. Some talk about cat fur coat patterns determining personalities turns to a more existential talk of easy and superficial ways people use things like astrology and the MBTI to put themselves into boxes.

Shinobi for the PlayStation 2 isn’t a bad game. In fact, Kaye knows that she’s bringing a backdoor WOFF! pick to the show. However, it’s janky and it’s overly difficult because it’s from an era before character action was solved. When we run out of stuff to say about Shinobi, we start brainstorming business ideas to make use of a loophole to get infinite free wood chips… or at least how to use them to inflict them on your enemies.